I almost got laid tonight
 

I brought another chic home tonight. This time I was in the mood for the booty and not the back rub.

We started fooling around and I went to get a rubber

I accidently broke the rubber when I put it on inside out.

I was drunk so don't rag me about it.

anyway, I reached under my bed to get another one and it was the last ------- one.

I told the chic to hold on and I went out to my shop and got some jb weld. I started putting it on the cracked spot and she was like "WTF are you doing?" I told her i was out of condoms and I was patching it up.

the next thing I know she was putting her clothes back on. I told her "so i guess we're not scrumpin" and she obviously said no

anyway I said your at least going to SNOFF! right?

she's like WTF is SNOFF

I said

SUCK A NI99A OFF! BITCH!

anyway she left pissed off as all hell.

i'm headed back out to the club now to get another chic and some more condoms.

If I get pissed at the next one I'm breaking out the JB weld condom!

Re: I almost got laid tonight
 

This is ------- pointless. I hate these threads about almost knocking ppl out, almost getting laid, almost almost alsmot. Talk to me when you get laid, knock someone out. Or combine the two.

Re: I almost got laid tonight
 

You can stop already. Everyone thinks your cool. :1

Re: I almost got laid tonight
 

stfu kthx

Re: I almost got laid tonight
 

Donkey Punch FTMFW!!!!

Re: I almost got laid tonight
 

/Fixed. :y

Re: I almost got laid tonight
 

obviosuly false

Re: I almost got laid tonight
 

Everything he writes is...

Are you just trying to get acceptance? You ------- homo

Re: I almost got laid tonight
 

ur my hero.... not if you were a real man ud ---- her with no rubber and pull out.. faggot.

Re: I almost got laid tonight
 

Takes one to know one