Dr.Boost

----, I would OD on that ----. As I got more comfortable with them I'd start crushing them and sniffing them, then boiling them to smoke, and if ---- really got serious I'd be slamming that ----.
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CRXDrew

LOL

91efate

lol you should do an episode of scared straight(anti-pregnancy edition). nah she knows to take that pill everyday at 8pm on the dot i've already drilled her on it. she hasn't missed a day yet. i watch her take............my pimp hand is STRONG! lol

MikeJ-2009

With baby bin laden, yes. She said she missed a day or some ---- like that and boom. With this newest one it was "well, they say you're supposed to take it at the same time everyday, and I didn't". Well, you never did.
The big thing is when one of her friends or someone she knows has a baby.

[stealthmode theory]
they start thinking
"I'm getting old, I should have a baby too."
"Her baby is so cute, I want one."
"Oh, look at ______, they're having so much fun being married."
"Maybe I should speed up my proposal".
ect.
ect.


And in the process of having these thoughts, they start getting lax on taking the pill. Not neglecting to take it all together, just not thinking it's as big a deal if they forget a day or so. (Kinda like hotrex's shipping. He means to do it, it's just not important enough to do it at the right time) With this thinking they forget a day or "don't take it at the same time" and when they get pregnant, it's not REALLY their fault (in their mind) because they didn't do it on PURPOSE, they just got lax and fucked up your sex life.
[/stealthmode theory]

And when you find out, you wish they would eat the whole next months worth of pills for dinner.

The best advice I have for everyone is to casually have a talk with your girlfriend (like you're really interested) and ask her what she envisions for kids. If you are seriously asking, they will seriously tell you. They'll say something like "I want 2 before I'm 30" or whatever. They all have a plan in their head, and unless you protect yo neck covertly you aren't going to change the plan. If you have a girl that says "---- that, I don't want any kids", than you should be golden. But if they say they want X amount of kids by 30 and she's 23, then brace yo muthafucken self.

The greatest sex is sex that you know you don't have to worry about that ----. Pull it out and bust it on her back/face, and tell her that's what you like. Tell her thats what really makes you happy. Then one time you'll do it and she'll get flaming pissed, BRACE YO *****-FUCKEN SELF. She's mad cause you didn't put it where she really wanted it.

91efate

put them babies where they belong

myshtern

This got me rolling

Reddy

Aren't you a little resentful towards your wife if this is what you really think happened?

ToeJam

If you even think your girl might "slip" then get her *** on the shot and you go with her to the doctors and watch him inject that ----. Girls are twisted bitches and if they want a baby or think there is a chance that they wil lose you, then they will "slip".
Don't give the woman the power to change the rest of your life. I know tons of girls that get knocked up on purpose and make it look like an accident. I would be pissed if someone decided my future for me.

MikeJ-2009

I'm not the type of person who believes in accidents. Especially twice. I was really pissed both times. Baby bin-mixalot is all I've ever wanted, just a little early perhaps. This new one really pissed me off, especially when you ask "OH YEAH, HOW THE ---- DID IT HAPPEN THIS TIME" and you hear something like, "well, everything will work out".
I confronted her about her lax *** attitude and she swore up and down that she would never do something like that that would offend my trust. At that point, you either have to divorce her and hire a hitman, or give her the benefit of the doubt and chalk it up to another screw up and live/support the person you already commited to live/support for the rest of your life anyway. I'm the leader of the "everything happens" for a reason squad, and there is a definate possibility that the higher power thinks I'll be a good baseball coach or something. Who the ---- knows. This is life, get used to it.

The "baby's in the vicinity" thing is no joke though. First time her friend was pregnant, she got pregnant, and then our friends started getting pregnant ect. This second time the neighbor was pregnant when it happened. I think there's a chemical in womens' head that when there's a baby close by they start itching to have a crying ---- factory of thier own. Kinda like how disneyland sprays the bushes with chemicals to make you crave their $85 hotdogs.

91efate

yea women do ---- like that. oh i want a baby.... just because the friend has one or is pregnant. how dumb oh we can go shopping for maternity cloths together, and have or babies in the same month.