Being my wife is fun.
 

Logged on to facebook today, and my wifes account is still logged in. I guess one of her friends couldn't wait to instant message me:

Amber

k so I have been waiting for you so i could tell you privatley. there is this guy i was in the air force with
5:31pmKari

yeah.
5:31pmAmber

I was chatting with him and he asked me if i was dating anyone, i told him no, then at the end of the whole conversation this is what he sent me. I seem to have missed you, my dear. I was just looking at your photo again and thinking back to those days of working together... wondering what it might be like to taste your lips... hmmm...
5:32pmKari

Are you gonna take him up on his offer?
5:32pmAmber

dont know. he lives in hawaii
5:33pmKari

Well, fly there.
5:33pmAmber

lol. i told him I cant afford to fly to freaking hawaii he said he could help me with that
5:34pmKari

Yeah, but then you'd be in debt once you got there.
5:34pmAmber

lol. he would pay for everything.
5:34pmKari

monetarily, yes.
5:36pmAmber

I need to end this drought I am in. lol
5:36pmKari

what drought?
5:36pmAmber

haha. nevermind. all I can say is it has been 2 years
5:37pmKari

You saw him 2 years ago?
5:37pmAmber

um no

nevermind. still the innocent Kari I see
5:38pmKari

I'm not understanding your beating around the bush.

Not sure what you're saying.
5:38pmAmber

it has been 2 years since i have had sex. geez
5:38pmKari

oh dang

What's the big deal about that?
5:38pmAmber

lol

just how long it has been
5:39pmKari

Well, you can still dip your trigger finger in your fun-dip ANYTIME you want, though.
5:39pmAmber

hahaha. ok. i take the innocent thing back
5:39pmKari

ya think?
5:40pmAmber

now I do
5:41pmKari

Wow, I just thought of something super funny.
5:48pmAmber

what
5:48pmKari

huh?
5:49pmAmber

you said you just thought of something super funny
5:49pmKari

Oh yea.
5:49pmAmber

lol
5:50pmKari

So I was thinking, wouldn't it be super duper funny if like, my husband went onto facebook, but then my account was still logged in, and this whole conversation happened while I was at work?

That'd be great!

Why'd I think of that? I don't know.
5:51pmAmber

haha. that would be pretty funny
5:51pmKari

I should be more careful about signing out.
5:51pmAmber

yes. why. hmmm. this is Kari right? lol
5:52pmKari

I mean, you could have just told my husband that you haven't gotten the shaft for 2 years.
5:52pmAmber

haha
5:52pmKari

He'd actually play along too. (I think)
5:52pmAmber

great.
5:52pmKari

Yeah, he's an ------- like that.
5:53pmAmber

ok

interesting
5:53pmKari

Sometimes I want to cheat on him......with a black guy.

A retarded looking black guy.
5:55pmAmber

this isnt Kari huh?
5:57pmAmber

oh, ----

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

k, so your wife wants to cheat or does amber? im lost here. fb chat is gay.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

haha nice work Steve

cant read huh?

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

funny ----.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

That's the funniest thing I've heard all week.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

nevermind, figured it out LOL

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

hah ------ steve

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

That is classic, it almost deserves a place on bash.org

Well done Steve

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

zing

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

I spit rum all over my keyboard. Rolling on the ------- floor. ;D

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

awesome :D

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Classic

You mean bacardi right

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

I call bullshit.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Pics of Wifemodes said friend.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Now that I'm logged out, I can't get the pictures. Just imagine a girl who can't get a wang for 2 years.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

A retard looking black guy. lol. That was awesome Steve. You should of said something like "Steve and I have talked about having a threesome and were were gonna ask you if you wanted to give it a whirl? It would end your two year drought."

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

thats awesome! good work

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Best thing I've read all day. Well done :6

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

steve isnt smart enough to come up with that on his own. thats why he gets jews to write the lyrics to his raps.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Lol that was great >:D

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Well played sir, What does the Wifemode have to say about this?

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

very nice. made me laugh.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

i've said it time and time again, steve ur the man

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

i bet wifemode would beat stevemode's ass if she found out :y

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

She had just left for work, so I called her to let her in on the funneez. You must understand that my wife can get irritated with me, but being pissed won't change my shenanigans, so it doesn't happen. I actually talked to her friend for a little longer, told her it was me haha funneez, and everything was good. Her friend was a good sport as well.


It seems a recent trend for you to cry for attention. Everyone knows I'm the one liner king, and I write all of my own lyrics. If you've been depressed and are thinking of ending it, call me for tips, Mohammed.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Yeah, cause wives who go to the drag races and shooting range for their anniversaries are so hard to deal with. :P

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Classic.. is there another kind of black guy?

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

I believe there's the retarded looking, the cracked out, and the mad rare professional looking breeds of black guys. I figured the retarded looking would sound more believable.


Join me for the klan meeting this weekend!! :l

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

touche, sir, touche

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

pics of wifemodes friend

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

you forgot the tough-guy looking black guy that dines on 40's and jailbait

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Creeping pics or ban

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

X99

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Oh. Thanks for reminding me. To recap, we have:

1) Retarded looking
2) Cracked out
3) Mad rare professional
4) Smoother than a nigga in a nightclub (40'z and jailbait version)


I've already adressed this issue, and it's a non-worthwhile cause.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

We need wife mode's cell # so we can give her a good HMT call-a-thon :6

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Was your wife the semi-hottie that would hang out with pigs so that she looked better than her friends out at da club? O0

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

that was hilarious steve.

"yeah, he's an ------- like that"

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

HAHAHAHAHA

stevemode, your awesome dude

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

Not to my knowledgabilities. This is some girl she went to high school with. I've never met her in 10 years.

Re: Being my wife is fun.
 

She's out on a trip right now for work, and has to wake up early tomorrow. Be sure that she's checking this thread though to find out the jist of the sitch. Just post your number in the thread and maybe she'll call you.

Oh, and Kari, whether you call 88dx or not, I'm still tearing into that birth canal when you get home. O0