God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

So, I'm down in my basement looking around HMT and watching some stupid internet videos when all of a sudden my doorbell rings. I walk upstairs to see my 2 dobermans staring out the bay window into our (fenced in) yard and they are both growling. I open the door and am immedeatly greated by 2 goofy lookin fucks in black pants, white shirts, and black ties. They are both holding bibles.

The one guy starts his little speech "Hello, we are just in the neighborhoo....."

I interrupt with, "get the ---- off of my property or I'll let my dogs out."

"Well, actually sir, that is the exact attitude that we are here to talk about today, and if you would just give me a minute of your time, I would like..."

"Murphy!"

My 125 lb male doberman comes between me and the guy and sits down, never taking his eye off of the guy.

"Well isn't he just a cute dog?"

"Hayleigh!"

My 80 lb female doberman joins Murphy. "Now get the ---- out of my yard before I yell. See the great things about having extremely protective dogs is when I get mad, they get mad, see where I'm going with this?"

"Sorry sir, I guess you don't care about your afterlife as much as you should then, have a nice day."

They dropped some shitty little pamphlet in the yard on their way out. :)

EDIT: let me introduce you to the dogs! (click click)
http://img138.imagevenue.com/loc60/t...3_1303_IMG.JPG http://img129.imagevenue.com/loc237/...ets_go_out.JPG

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

LOL.. they're nuts, I tell ya. My pap made one cry, it was great...

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

you should've just not answered the door. much easier.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Can't see who is standing at the door from the bay window. It's hit or miss when I open that thing.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

that is classic, maybe even legendary! next time, tell them you worrship satin that freaks them out nicely.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

------- awesome.

Don't ever seem like you have the slightest bit of interest in what they have to say, or they will come back multiple times. Happened to my mom before and they came back once a week for a month, until I was home once when they came over.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

125lbs? Looks like 90lbs. At any rate, when you "persecute" them they believe it is doing it for God. They are nearly right, except Jehovah's Witness is pretty much a cult.


"Blessed are those who are persecuted..."


JP

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Those are mormons..... :S

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

The last Jehovah's that came to my house were two smoking hot blondes. I mean it was like straight out of a porn. All they did was "Here's some pamphlet's" and they left. They woke me up so I was all out of it. I was in shock and awe at what just happened. By the time it registered they were already leaving. :'( I guess I'm one of the few that now sits and waits for the Jehovah's to come back. But than again its probably a lost cause since the Jesus lovers don't really put out. :3

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Got him weighed at the vet about a month and a half ago 123.7 lbs.

Hmmmm, I didn't realize that we had mormons in North Dakota. Sorry I'm not up on my proper religion dress code. :1

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Actually I just went to the web site on the back of the pamphlet. http://www.watchtower.org/ I was right, they are Jehovah's Witnesses.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Umm, Whitey.. Jehovah's Witnesses don't really believe in Jesus.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

[IMG width=600]http://img68.imageshack.us/img68/9602/p10100024nd.jpg[/img]

My reasoning. 116lbs. Solid dog. Dobermans just seem lean to me you know?


SinisterCRX, is right. He's like Satan's brother. Or is that Mormons? I forget. :S I think they are like the Jews and believe the Messiah hasn't come yet.


JP

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

well apparently they dont believe in putting out either

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

I had some JW's come by the house, and Andy got into it with them about how God was stupid, he took LSD for spiritual enlightenment.

JW: "L-LSD?? But... think about the COST??"

Andy: "What cost? It's, like, five dollars!"

Everybody was laughing so hard the JW's just left.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

I know they believe he was crucufied on a Stake and not a cross. My one friend is a Jehovah.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

That's wrong.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beliefs...%27s_Witnesses

Jesus is a created being and God's first creation. Jesus was used by God to create every other creation.[10] Jesus was known as the Archangel Michael in his pre-human existence; his birth on earth was accomplished when God transferred Michael's life force from heaven to the womb of the virgin Mary.[11] While on earth, Jesus was executed for mankind's sins upon a single beamed torture stake. The cross is rejected as a symbol for Christ's death, instead seen as a later pagan addition.[12] Jesus acts as the mediator of the "new covenant" for those going to heaven (the 144,000)[13] Mary was not ever-virgin, but rather bore more children after Jesus[14]

It's funny how little the Bible bangiers know about the other bible bangers.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Yeah we do....otherwise how can you be a christian....there's a lot of misconceptions and people telling stories, but not a lot of people know how it is or what it is. It's just people being ignorant with things they don't know or don't understand, just like with other non christian religions or other cultures.

Now they are weird and crazy people in all groups and religions.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Sorry, jeesh, I was thinking of Islam.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

lol :y

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

I swear my house was on a hit list or something, for a while they were stocking my dad and every time he would "out argue" them. The last time they came around I was in the garage, making a downpipe. I'm not sure what I told them, but we haven't seen them in a year+...they also offered to help "work on my engine" I laughed and said no thanks.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

As far as I know Islam also believes in Jesus, he just isn't as important as Mohamed (sp).

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Hmm, I knew very little of that. I don't tend to learn in those religions I'm not apart of, but rather a breif synopsis of them. I need not know them because I'm not "searching" for a religion. They have no relevance to me.


JP

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Well, I mean, they believe that there was a man named Jesus but they do not believe that he was the Savior, the Messiah, God's son, etc etc.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

It's the short hair, and the dogs are NOTHING but muscle.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

davcivic-based off of what you have said, I'm assuming that you are a Jehovah's Witness. I've got a question for you that I've always wondered about. Why do your places of worship (sorry, not sure if it's a church, temple, or what) not have any windows?

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Windows are expensive. :P I never noticed this. Hmm, I have to look next time.


Yea, Dobermans are my 2nd favorite next to the German Shepard. You should see my cousin's Doberman. Most beautiful dog I've ever seen, EVER. :y Gorgeous. My dog is getting old and I don't know what he weighs now, but before he was solid. He definitly was never really lean, but NEVER fat.


JP

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Air conditioner.....that's it, less windows or no windows makes it more efficient....and sound proofing....nothing goes in...

If you ever go to one, well the newer ones built just to be a church, are design that way. Just one big hall, bathrooms, and a couple of other smaller rooms, one for files and paperwork, and other just for different meetings/talks. Nothing out of the order, nothing strange, no cult weird acts, no killing of animals, nothing. Just a person or a few talking about the bible and how it can be applied to our life today.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

My neighbor that bought my turbo EK is a Jovie. He isn't pushy about religion and never even brings it up. Just practices his faith.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

That's the thing that some people are way to fanatical about things sometimes and actually don't act the "right" way and seem crazy. I have found people like that everywhere and for different causes not just religion....

If you want to learn and have no faith in God and the Bible I'll help out, that's the way I see it, but if you simply don't want to, don't care for it, don't give a damn about your life, or just don't believe...well that's your problem, your decision and that's where it ends...It makes no sense trying to push someone to learn something they don't want to learn.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Also whats the deal with no holidays (another question I've always wondered about)? I'd be pretty pissed if I didn't get toys for christmas and a blowjob on my birthday.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

don't jahovas believe that in heaven the streets are paved with gold or some ----? thats all i know about em

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

lol, it says that in the Bible, when John was making an account of how Heaven looked...

Revelations 21:21 - The twelve gates were twelve pearls. Each one of the gates was made of one pearl. The street of the city was pure gold, like transparent glass.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

I just noticed, either you have man-boobs or your gf has a gut :D

P.S. - Did you also use your siamese cat to threaten them?

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

actually, I was standing in front of the dogs taking the pic, and no she doesn't have a gut, it's just the way she is standing see, look, no gut (thumbs). Sorry boys, I had to blur some things as per her request.

http://img120.imagevenue.com/loc128/...0_1082_IMG.JPG http://img24.imagevenue.com/loc3/th_66445_megpic.JPG

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

She's sucking in.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

Thats what you get for trying to correct me. :6

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

here goes my go on religion.

there is no god, and there is no purpose that we are put here, believing in a religion is a crutch for the weak, who must feel that they know all the answers to the unaswerable questions in the universe. When in fact, these unanswerable questioins are just that, unanswerable, and they are meant to be that way. Why are we here? the weak say, god put us here, were here as a test because god placed us here. In all actuallity, we dont know why we are here, no one can prove that 'god put us here' or even that there is a 'god'. I dont doubt that there is probably a higher power, but i think its idiotic to believe hes a man or its even a he, or its even a being like you and i. Theres more to this world and this universe than anyone can comprehend, and religion is a way to attempt to comprehend it for those that cannot live in a world were there are unanswerable questions. There really is no right way to think or be, no one is wrong no one is completely right, and you wont burn in 'hell' for not believing someones ideas. if you live your life decently and dont believe in a god then why are you any different from the person that does? blah blah blah, end rant

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

You can't prove to me there is no God, and I can't prove to you that there is a God.

Everyone will have their own personal beliefs.

Re: God damned Jehovah’s Witnesses.
 

And you also can't prove that I am not God, therefore I am.