Glenn Beck........love this guy....
02-06-2007, 10:10 AM
#1
1.0 BAR
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 610
Glenn Beck........love this guy....
Back To School…
January 29th, 2007
I saw this story the other night, and it really made me mad because I’m a parent…although, I found it kinda’ funny too. Here’s the deal—they arrested this guy in Arizona for registering for school as a seventh grader. It seems he was actually a little older than he pretended to be. See, in case you’ve forgotten, seventh graders are 12 years-old, and this guy was…29.
Now, come on—that’s sick and twisted for sure, but I still can’t believe he got away with it. You can see this guy’s picture online—his name is Neil Havens Rodreick II. (yup—sure sounds like the name of a 12 year-old to me!) He looks young (but at my age, who doesn’t?), but man—either he really blended in seamlessly like Johnny Depp as one of those detectives from that show 21 Jumpstreet, or the people running the school system in Arizona are complete idiots. This Neil Havens Rodreick II registered under the name “Casey Price”, which is a creepy sex offender name if Ive ever heard one. That alone should have been a red flag.
I mean, can you imagine getting that call from the principal—”Yes, hello—Mr. Beck? It seems we have a little situation down here at the middle school. No, your kids are fine…it just that we just found out that we…um, you know…we admitted a 29 year-old man to the seventh grade.” If it was me getting that call, I’d be like—why don’t you just quit now Mr. Principal, because I’m going to sue you and every chalk-eating moron in that school system—get out the checkbook and start writing a big number with lots of zeros after it. Then I heard the school spokesperson have the audacity to say, “he was a good student, he handed in his homework—he didn’t present any administrative or discipline problems.” She stopped just short of saying, “if only we had a whole school full of him—he’s a delight!”
Of course this guy handed in his homework—he’s 29 frickin’ years old–he’s known how to do that stuff for 17 years! According to Stephen King, I’m mentally challenged and even I could do seventh grade homework…probably. And yes—obviously this guy was going to be on his best behavior—he was there to molest children, not pick fights on the playground! He got busted when the school finally discovered that he forged his birth certificate. (I guess this guy must have been REALLY good in art class—I wonder if he offered to make all the kids a fake I.D. as a way of making friends?)
There’s more to this story, but mostly it’s really sick. But instead of dwelling on the negative, let me instead offer a public service to all those in the education system here in America so this doesn’t happen again.
You know that southern comedian Jeff Foxworthy who had that routine, “You Might Be a Redneck…?” Well, here’s my version called, “Your New Student Might Be Too Old For The Seventh Grade…” Here we go:
If he asks where he can park his car, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he’s absent for a week because he couldn’t get out of jury duty, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he’s in the school cafeteria and he asks to see the wine list, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he asks whether you use a blade or an electric, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he remembers Michael Jackson from the Jackson Five, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade. (and if he sees Michael Jackson as a role model, that might be a “red flag” too)
If for “show and tell” he rolls up his sleeve to give the class a better look at his tattoo, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he talks about movies and music from the late 1980s…almost like he was there, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he asks to go see the school nurse so he can have his prostate checked, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If most of the kids are taking Flintstone vitamins and he’s taking Viagra, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he was late for school because he had to vote, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he remembers Nancy Pelosi before all the plastic surgery, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If the teacher makes a “Where’s The Beef?” reference and he’s the only one who laughs, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If the kids are talking about Britney Spears and he says, “she’s no Joey Heatherton,” your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he remembers Madonna when she was sexy, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he refers to a movie as a “talkie,” your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
On Veteran’s Day, if he and the guest speaker trade war stories…literally, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
And finally…
If someone brings in cupcakes for their birthday and he doesn’t eat one because “he’s on Atkins,” your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
I hope this helps—while I may not have a degree in education…I am a thinker. I guess in Arizona, they have that reversed.-glenn
Posted in Glenn | 32 Comments »
State of the Union — My ADD Thoughts
January 24th, 2007
Balance the Federal Budget . . . Hmmm. Right. Without raising taxes. Not everyone stood followed by spending and NO ONE EVEN CLAPPED.
Such a game . . .
Hillary looks happy . . .Earmarks . . . 13,000 earmarks in one year? Wow. Cut earmarks. VERY GOOD THING. Must be passed by congress. NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. It is how they get re-elected.
Failing in SSI . . . Yep. Long term people like J. Lieberman. You know this is a game. How do you even act interested?
Schools . . . How is it we don’t understand and give local control to parents.
Heathcare . . . Democrats stand first. They must like sick people more than Republicans.
Can we get the two old farts from the muppets in the balcony behind Bush instead of Cheney and Pelosi? More fun to watch.
Health care . . . changing the tax code
Really how about getting rid of the tax code?
How do you become a Democrat and really believe that government does things better than private sector? Where is A N Y evidence? Where has it E V E R worked?Did it **** anyone else off that when he talked about the border pelosi was nodding her head? NEITHER ONE OF THESE GUYS HAVE DONE ANYTHING ABOUT THIS ISSUE.
Is there more clapping this year?
Resolve status of illegal immigrants with out AMNESTY OR ANIMOSITY? What does that mean?Clean safe nuclear power. Uh …. tell that to Nancy. I would have love to have seen him turn around and look at her when he said this.
It’s been 10 minutes and I am really ready to watch Wheel of Fortune reruns where it ends in a money tie and all the puzzles are the same and they spell out CAT IN HAT.
75% import cut. Hmmm.
Double capacity of oil supplies! WOW. How long has it taken us to get it where it is? This is because we no long have the navy yards due to Clinton I’ll bet. This is about the military and what is coming. THIS IS THE LINE THAT JUMPED OUT TO ME.
What we do know on terror. GREAT STUFF.
Blow up planes over the ocean. BULL CRAP. Why would they do that. Here is an example of our government trying to make us feel safe. We don’t want to think of planes falling out of the sky over our cities.
Funding terror groups like Hezbollah. What is the Bush doctrine?
What did congress say after 9-11 He just spelled out a country that we must destroy based on our own pledge all in one sentence.
Hillary I believe was one of the only democrat up after ‘we must’ stand for free people.
Why is what is happening in Lebanon right now being covered? It is Muslim on Muslim killing. It proves that it is not about us or Israel it is about power.
No Democratic clapping on NOT ABANDONING FRIENDS OR STRENGTHEN OUR RESOLVE TO VICTORY.
How are people keeping a straight face against more troops when they lectured us about following the Baker report? How come we don’t HEAR A N Y T H I N G about this now? I thought it was SOOO important.
Best description of what will happen if we lose in Iraq. THANK YOU! Pelosi was pissed at the 9-11 comment at the end of the Iraq part. Her wheels are turning This will not go unmentioned.
Pelosi is not for expanding the military. Civilian corps? Is this new? Have we ever done this before?
Pelosi up first on Iran and no nukes.
Free BURMA. Is that the place that makes the beach dunes? How did that get in the speech. Darfur. Once again not explained.
Fight Aids in Africa? Didn’t we fund the largest largest Aids program ever? Now Malaria too? Also, do you really think a Democratic congress is going to cut off Aids funding?
The end of the speech is really the favor bucket. Dikembe Mutumbo. Great example. THIS IS WHAT THE PRIVATE SECTOR DOES. Did they get the shortest person in the world to sit next to him?
Baby Einstein Lady — Hot Judy as I like to call her. Don’t be subtle with the message. THIS IS THE ENGINE THAT DRIVES OUR COUNTRY.
Wesley the train guy. WOW. Cool. Pointing out Congress men and women like shout outs. I thought for a second he was going mouth — call me.
GREAT ENDING MESSAGE. Ths is due to the poll that says we are on the wrong track. GREAT ENDING. John Kerry ran out.
Democratic response. Not so much.
First half bs, second half great. It is who he is. He is a guy that believes in the war on terror. The rest is political.
Our cause in the world is just. Democrats don’t agree.
Posted in Glenn | 48 Comments »
Progress
January 16th, 2007
I’ve been thinking a lot lately…even last week when I was in Los Angeles (shhh…they frown upon that sort of thing out there), and it hit me. You know how some people wonder if, given all of our technological advancements and hi-tech gadgets, we’re really any happier today than we were 50 years ago?
I gave this idea some serious, serious thought…then I checked my e-mail from my cell phone…and decided: Yes—we’re WAY happier! Now look—you’ve heard me ramble on about the values of our grandparents (I may have even cried) and I still believe in that sentiment whole-heartedly. Past generations seemed to believe in more meaningful things and I wish we placed more value on character today than we seem to. But…there’s no reason why we can’t improve the quality of our character while I watch the new episode of “24” on my video iPod, now is there? Sure, there may have been a better work ethic in the post-war years…you could take a man at his word and trust in the fact that his handshake was stronger than any contract. But once all the hand-shaking and word-giving was over, wouldn’t it have been nice to turn on a Playstation 3 and spend a few hours with “Madden 2007?” And then slide over to the microwave oven and pop in some “Totino’s 3 Meat Pizza Rolls” or maybe send a text message to Subway and have them fix you up a nice Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki sub? I say, yes, yes, a thousand times yes—it would have been nice because it’s awesome today (and I should know—I did extensive Pizza Roll research before I wrote this).Cell phones make communication effortless and much more efficient (that is, except if I’m trying to avoid a call from my wife—then they’re a wasteful nuisance). And laptop computers—it wasn’t really that long ago that the first computer—Univac–was so big it took up a whole room…and you couldn’t even get eBay on it! Today we have a computer that fits in your hand and that allows us instead to fill a room with a 60” High-Def plasma flat-screen TV. All the better to watch a digitally-restored movie on my new Blu-Ray DVD player. If that isn’t progress, I don’t know what is.So here’s to more personal electronics and happiness in the future. Batteries not included…
glenn
Posted in Glenn | 44 Comments »
In & Out Burger Is a Delicious Place To Eat
January 10th, 2007
You know how my titles for these blog entries are usually funny or some bitingly clever play on words? Not this time. No, this time I’m giving it to you straight…right from the “gut” as it were! (Wow…even when I’m trying to be serious I manage to bring laughter into the world—how do I do it?) Now, I have to admit that while I had heard of In & Out Burger, I had never eaten there (especially now that I’m trying to stay thin so I can fit into a size 52-husky bathing suit this summer). But one of the guys I’m traveling with was insistent that we stop there (yes, it is John Bobey, my doughy writer who ate his way across the country during the Christmas tour). Mr. “I gained 15 pounds on tour but don’t say anything ‘cause it’s a secret” (oops—my bad!) was talking about In & Out Burger in the car on the way to the airport—and we were still in New York—so I knew we’d have to stop or never hear the end of his carnivorous mantra. So once we landed in L.A. we asked our driver to stop on the way to the hotel (you know how nothing settles a stomach fresh from a turbulent 5–hour flight like fast food) so we could get us some. We were going to hit the drive-thru, but there must have been 15 cars in line ahead of us. Normally, I would have been annoyed, but the fat guy inside of me (okay fine—and outside of me) figured that, with a line that long, the food must be good. So we went in. If you’ve never been in an In & Out Burger, you’re initially struck by how clean the place is–it’s like a hospital where you can get an endless prescription for milk shakes. Then you look at the menu—hamburgers, cheeseburgers, french fries, and drinks. That’s it. No fish, no “chicken” nuggets, no rib-like patties or breakfast entrees infused with syrup. Just a simple selection of good old-fashioned burgers and fries. I ordered a Double-Double (mmmmm …double meat and double cheese…and it’s fun to say “Double-Double”—try it!) with onions and an extra large Diet Coke that came in a cup big enough to give a baby a bath in (not that I would do that of course). A couple of the guys got fries (of course John Bobey did—after all, you can’t maintain a Homer Simpson-like appearance by cutting back on the carbs), and they smelled like little golden sticks of Heaven. And not only was the food amazing, but two people recognized me and said “hi” while we were waiting, so it’s obvious that In & Out Burger attracts an intelligent customer with excellent taste in both snacks and cable news. We took our burgers in the car, ate them in silence like Zen monks contemplating the meaning of life as it pertains to cheeseburgers, and headed to the hotel. After all, we had to rest up for dinner in a couple of hours (prime rib at Mastro’s Steak House). Apparently, when in L.A….”Beef—it’s what’s for lunch…and dinner!”
I’m having a great time. Remember—if the In & Out Burger was convenient to stop at on our way from the airport, I bet it’s the same on the way to the airport. Double-Double number two–come to daddy…
-glenn
Posted in Glenn | 58 Comments »
It’s Déjà vu All Over Again
January 3rd, 2007
You know that movie Groundhog Day where Bill Murray keeps living the same day over and over and over again? Well, I realized that this blog has been largely the same…subjecting you all to the same December 8th entry with seemingly no end in sight. Granted—my Blue Velvet Suit wrote some funny stuff and that “Harrisburrrg!” title is pure gold, but I firmly believe that you deserve an update. See, this blog thing is tricky—I guess the notion is that I have interesting stuff to say all the time…but those of you who tune in to the radio and TV shows know that is definitely not the case. On the other hand, I often have thoughts that I feel compelled to share…not just because I’m a gifted communicator with the ability to fuse entertainment with enlightenment ™, but because I care about…you. Obviously, you can see the conflict. Whatever–I am but a conduit for the genius that flows through me, so I suggest that neither one of us thinks too hard about it and we simply enjoy the quality time this blog provides.
For instance, I bet you’ve all been wondering over your Christmas holiday about my office, right? I thought so. I may have mentioned in the past that I have a bad back, so much so that it starts to flare up whenever I sit down for a long period of time. (And you thought hosting a radio show was easy…) As I’m sure you can imagine, sitting behind a desk before my big time TV show, taking a nap…I mean, doing all my important hosting stuff, can take its toll. That’s when I looked into a “standing desk.” It’s just like a regular “sitting desk,” but it’s higher…you know, so it’s at the right level when I’m “standing.” There is a “chair” that goes with the “standing desk,” but it’s more like a hi-tech modified ergonomic stool with a back on it. I think it looks like Captain Kirk’s chair on Star Trek. Actually, the similarities between me and Kirk are striking…like, I think if you look closely you’ll see that William Shatner and I wear strikingly similar toupees (more so in his T.J. Hooker years, but he didn’t sit in a special chair so that’s why I mentioned Star Trek).
Anyway, since I’m getting a new desk, I decided to have my whole office redone. They took out all the old stuff and painted the walls a lovely shade of deep violet—it’s much more conducive to sleepin…I mean, thinking. Then they installed three flat screen TVs. I guess the reasoning behind that was so I can keep tabs on a bunch of networks simultaneously and think about news-type stuff, but I find that if I watch the Cartoon Network, the Food Network, and the Home Shopping Network all at the same time, I gain a unique insight and know way more than enough to have a lucid understanding of current events. I believe my work speaks for itself…
So that’s what’s new with me. Post a comment and let me know how you’ve been, and be sure to sign up for our weekly newsletter. It’s free and fresh each and every week…usually.
glenn
Posted in Glenn | 47 Comments »
Harrisburrrr! Wow, It Sure Is Cold Here!
December 8th, 2006
Glenn suggested that title, and now I’m regretting having agreed to use it. It’s beneath a suit in my price point. Yes, it me again, Glenn’s Blue Velvet Suit, the dreamy outfit that’s making Glenn’s Christmas Tour not just tolerable, but a revelation in holiday entertainment. Imagine Elvis (and since we’re making a Glenn comparison here, yes—the fat Elvis) in 1977 without the white jump suit. That’s the transformation I’m able to achieve—taking a misshapen dolt who cries with the frequency of a newborn and making him into a vision in blue velvet. And if you see Glenn on tour, don’t think that you’re the first person to start crooning Bobby Vinton’s “Blue Velvet.” People have been coming up with that “original” idea since Denver. And speaking of Colorado, thanks to my innate ability to bring joy, the tour really hit its stride in the Mile High City.
Glenn had some family in town in Denver and he got a case of the stagefrights like it was his 2nd grade Christmas pageant. A lesser suit would have found it charming, but me? It was pathetic. Were it not for my unflappability, the audience would have been in tears as well—not welling up with holiday sentiment, but tears of laughter as goofus flubbed the script. Once again, the cut of my jib saved the day, and it was a Merry Christmas after all.
Then it was off to Omaha where we re-ordered the show a bit. Yes, it was my idea. After a good pressing (the woman had the hands of an angel—I think I fell in love), it all became very clear to me and the show is flowing better than ever. Glenn continues to test the fortitude of my waistband by eating everything but the teeny hand soaps in the hotel bathroom. I hear in Omaha he skipped the spoon and drank the chicken jalapeno soup at Wheatfield’s right out of the bowl…then tried to pass it off as the “height of fashion” to eat soup that way. I also heard that nobody bought it—bravo Nebraska.
Now I sit crumpled in a booth of the Hilton’s “Raspberrie’s” restaurant in Harrisburg, PA. I mean me…crumpled. The bespectacled simpleton who Glenn hired to schlep me around the country has no class—he even spilled a little coffee on me (though I must say, it was delicious). He’s wearing mustard yellow sneakers and the same blazer I’ve seen for the last 3 days. If it weren’t for me, there would be no sartorial grace to this production whatsoever. Once again—Mr. And Mrs. America, you’re welcome.
Well, I’m off to the Forum, an art deco masterpiece featuring 8 different kinds of marble throughout the building, a stage paneled in Circassian walnut, and a breathtaking constellation-themed ceiling by Vincent Maragliotti. What, you’re not familiar with the decorative arts of the 1930s? You philistines—I may be just a simple but devastatingly beautiful blue velvet suit, but even I can appreciate the great architectural landmarks of the Keystone State. Get ye to Google!
I’m sorry—the coffee that my gangly handler spilled on me has obviously gotten me a bit keyed up. (Get it, “Keystone State…keyed up?” I got a million of ‘em!) I better sign off for now and relax—I don’t need the stress. It’ll be hard enough to wrap myself around big ol’ Beck. Let’s just say he likes to stay in hotels with 24 hour room service, but is he as adamant about an on-site workout facility? Hahahaha—oh that’s rich!
Get ready Pennsylvania—tonight, we get our velvet on!
–BVS
Posted in Glenn | 40 Comments »
He Wore Blue Velvet…
December 4th, 2006
For the rest of time that Glenn’s on his Christmas Tour, I’ll be updating his blog for him. See, I’m as close to him as you can get during this trip, and I’ll be able to give you all the gory details. Oh—I guess I should introduce myself—I’m Glenn’s velvet suit, the outfit responsible for making this tour a success. Mr. and Mrs. America, you’re welcome.
Glenn and I have been “collaborating” on this project since we met in New York just last week. Initially, I didn’t think it was going to work out—I mean, who would have believed that I would fit onto him (he’s sorta’ got the physique of a less fit Oprah). He says he’s been on the Atkins diet, but he must be referring to some other member of the family and not the famous weight loss guy. Perhaps there’s a Wally Atkins who thinks that approaching every meal as though it were some sort of eating contest is a good idea? But what do I know, I’m just a beautifully tailored suit in sumptuous blue velvet. I’m single-breasted (just like Glenn—don’t say anything—he’d kill me if he knew I told you) and exquisitely detailed (just like Gle…oh, who am I kidding—there’s no way you’ll buy that). Needless to say, when people get up on their feet to give Glenn a standing ovation, it won’t just be out of pity this time, but more so that they can get a better look at me. Yes, I’m worth it.
So, things are off to a great start. We left New York under less than ideal weather conditions (even I was queasy, I don’t have a stomach…just a lining of decadent Italian silk). I guess I should also mention that on this whole tour we’re traveling by private jet. Now, before you start to think that Glenn is sitting in the lap of luxury, let me burst your bubble. If I was dressing a bigger star (not literally—I’m not sure there is a bigger star…at least not one that isn’t currently on “The Biggest Loser”), the chartered jet would be sweet. But this is Beck, and this plane isn’t exactly state of the art. I believe it had been used in the past by the Peace Corps or some third-world cargo outfit, as the whole place smells like the pungent combination of sour milk and ethnic food…mostly chicken. And I don’t mean “cooked” chicken…but real, live chickens. There’s a funky livestock vibe about the whole plane, and I’m not at all happy (I found a feather in my pocket). Suffice it to say that you could be on a converted school bus traveling between Tijuana and Juarez, Mexico and be in more comfort and style than Glenn. Now, about the tour…
I look fantastic under the light show that accompanies Glenn’s ramblings. There’s just enough sheen to my fabric to really catch the light—it’s spectacular. People seem to be really responding to my plain front trousers—it’s a very contemporary look. The Salt Lake shows were both sold out (apparently, word of my arrival had been leaked to the press) and really tiring, but afterward I took a nice steam and crawled right back into my garment bag. Next thing I knew, I was in Denver. Don’t worry—I’ll hold up just fine with the altitude. Glenn? I’m not so sure. Let’s just say he gets winded from blinking, so being a mile high ain’t necessarily making his gut any easier to tote around. But once I’m on him and sporting my pocket square of dandy pink silk, all eyes are on me anyway.
I hope you can make it out to see me—after 12 shows in 2 weeks with limited dry cleaning opportunities, I’m not sure I’ll be around for future tours. I hear there are a few tickets left in some cities, so snap ‘em up while you can. And don’t worry if the seats are far from the stage—I’m the kind of suit that really plays to the back row.
Talk to you soon,
BVS
Posted in Glenn | 44 Comments »
7 Days Makes One Weak…
November 21st, 2006
Last week was easily the hardest for me since I started doing the television show. I’m just now coming down from the intensity of it all–it was quite a ride. For starters, my special on Islamic Extremism got on the air—forget for a moment how it did in the ratings, and let’s focus on that fact for a second. The show got on the air, and I can’t tell you how proud I am of that single accomplishment alone. Maybe some of you think that you just put a good show together, get someone to tape it, and then it just sort of ends up on TV—I know that’s how I used to think about it. I mean, we all know it’s more technically complicated than that, but basically I figured you just picked a compelling topic, asked interesting people interesting questions about that topic, and it ended up being compelling television. For good and for bad, nothing could be further from the truth.
The reality is that with a company as big as CNN Headline News (which is part of an ever bigger company called Time Warner), there are all sorts of rules, regulations, processes and procedures that come along with producing television—a system that I found often discouraging and always challenging. But you know what—I’m glad that I braved the storm. Our special presented information and a point of view that you don’t see on television, and I feel incredibly passionate about each and every word, especially since I was held accountable for each and every word. Even though I had complete confidence in the integrity of the material, I was forced to make sure every story and quote and translation held up to scrutiny, and they did. If you watched the special, what you saw was the cold hard truth as best I could present it. If you didn’t see it, keep an eye out, as we’ll be running it again. My entire staff—radio, TV and otherwise—went to the mat with me on this project, and the fact that it got on the air is an example of how much I and they sincerely care about what we do. I’m proud of us all.
As for the ratings? They rocked! It set a new record for our program and devastated our competition. That’s just the icing on the cake…
As for the other big news from last week, Jon Stewart and The Daily Show took their first shot at us, so I guess that means I’ve arrived. I won’t bore you all with the details, but they saw my interview with Muslim-American Representative-elect Keith Ellison, had a different point of view, and made one heck of a joke. If I had to get skewered, I’m glad it was by the best.
So as you can see, going to work last week was actually like…work. With Thanksgiving right around the corner, I better go lie down so I have enough energy to eat myself into a food coma. I’d hate run out of steam before I make it to the pies…
Happy Thanksgiving everybody—have a wonderful and safe holiday (and save me a drumstick).
-glenn
Posted in Glenn | 197 Comments »
The Show Must Go On . . .
November 13th, 2006
I am amazing.
Now, I’d hate for you to think that this is me getting carried away with myself…even though I do have a very healthy ego. No, the reason that I’m stating so emphatically that I’m so tremendous is this–last time I wrote to you all, it was in support of the wildly satisfying television show “Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.” As I’ve said before, I’m a huge fan of the stellar acting and writing, as well as the refreshingly “normal” portrayal of the female Christian character. There have been rumors of the show’s cancellation, and I asked all of you to give the show a chance. Well, in case you haven’t heard the news, NBC has ordered additional episodes of “Studio 60” so it looks like it’ll be around for a while longer.
I’m not saying that I saved the show, but I’m not not saying it either. Mr. Sorkin, you’re welcome.
And while we’re talking about Studio 60, there was a moment in an early episode when Matthew Perry’s character yelled at the show’s writers for not dressing like adults, and this week I almost did the same thing. Yes, I know that not everyone shares my often daring forays into fashion, but there are a few of the writers on my TV show who often sport the whole “blazer and ironic t-shirt” pairing. I mean, I understand and support Urban Outfitters’ right to sell t-shirts that say, “Gettin’ Lucky In Kentucky,” but I don’t support a grown man’s decision to wear it. I’m just sayin…
The Christmas tour is right around the corner, so I need to go make my “to do” list and check it twice. Rest assured, I’ll be sure to include “Tivo Studio 60” and “Bring Pink Shirts” on it. Now stop reading this and go buy some tickets—you don’t want to Christmis it!
-glenn
Posted in Glenn | 183 Comments »
Gone Too Soon . . .
November 6th, 2006
Every year without fail–it happens. I get too close too soon and then…they’re gone. No, I’m not talking about special Halloween decorated donuts at Krispy Kreme. Well…actually, I could be, but I’m not just not right now (I mean, why is orange-colored chocolate frosting so much more delicious than the regular cocoa brown-colored? What a delicious mystery…). What I am referring to are the new TV shows that premiere in September and then get cancelled. I tell myself to take it slow, get to really know them before I give myself over to that magical feeling—the butterflies in the stomach over a new infatuation. But I never listen.
I’d get in to what I went through over Cagney & Lacey…those daring, sassy vixens wrestling with love, family and being tough-as-nails police women…but the scars haven’t really healed yet. Sure there were the syndicated reruns, but it was never really the same. And every season since, I end up in this same mess with a different show—Designing Women, Growing Pains…Riptide. I can’t stop missing the laughs or the “very special” episodes—what was and what might have been.
This year, my heart belongs to Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip—it’s not officially gone yet, but it don’t look good. Now that I’m a big time TV star and a mover and shaker in the “biz,” I totally get all of the insider TV references, but that’s not even why I like it so much. As you’ve probably heard me say on my 3rd most listened to talk show in America, Studio 60 is smartly written and incredibly well acted. Plus, it’s the one show in a very, very long time that has presented a Christian character that’s three-dimensional. She’s bright, funny, charming and a real person, not some bible thumping cartoon character. In my opinion—especially considering that the vast majority of Americans hold their faith as a dear and vital part of their daily lives—it’s an appropriate reflection of the culture to present a character like that on mainstream TV. But even putting that aside…
The show’s just freakin’ awesome. Sadly, we don’t exactly have an excess of quality programming on network television (CNN Headline news?—now that’s a different story). Yes, there are good shows on the networks, but as long as there is a breath in my body and Two and a Half Men is on the air, I will always feel that there is room for more. So tonight, when you’re thinking about what to watch, you could do a whole lot worse that tune in and try on Studio 60. I’m not on some personal crusade here or suggesting that we all “save” the show, but I’m merely saying that it’s worth a look if you haven’t already. If you have, then know that while you’re watching and laughing and loving right along with those crazy kids trying to put on a show, I’m watching too. Take a moment and think of me, because somewhere I’m thinking of me, too.
-glenn
Posted in Glenn | 223 Comments »
« Previous Entries
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Beck Blog is powered by WordPress
January 29th, 2007
I saw this story the other night, and it really made me mad because I’m a parent…although, I found it kinda’ funny too. Here’s the deal—they arrested this guy in Arizona for registering for school as a seventh grader. It seems he was actually a little older than he pretended to be. See, in case you’ve forgotten, seventh graders are 12 years-old, and this guy was…29.
Now, come on—that’s sick and twisted for sure, but I still can’t believe he got away with it. You can see this guy’s picture online—his name is Neil Havens Rodreick II. (yup—sure sounds like the name of a 12 year-old to me!) He looks young (but at my age, who doesn’t?), but man—either he really blended in seamlessly like Johnny Depp as one of those detectives from that show 21 Jumpstreet, or the people running the school system in Arizona are complete idiots. This Neil Havens Rodreick II registered under the name “Casey Price”, which is a creepy sex offender name if Ive ever heard one. That alone should have been a red flag.
I mean, can you imagine getting that call from the principal—”Yes, hello—Mr. Beck? It seems we have a little situation down here at the middle school. No, your kids are fine…it just that we just found out that we…um, you know…we admitted a 29 year-old man to the seventh grade.” If it was me getting that call, I’d be like—why don’t you just quit now Mr. Principal, because I’m going to sue you and every chalk-eating moron in that school system—get out the checkbook and start writing a big number with lots of zeros after it. Then I heard the school spokesperson have the audacity to say, “he was a good student, he handed in his homework—he didn’t present any administrative or discipline problems.” She stopped just short of saying, “if only we had a whole school full of him—he’s a delight!”
Of course this guy handed in his homework—he’s 29 frickin’ years old–he’s known how to do that stuff for 17 years! According to Stephen King, I’m mentally challenged and even I could do seventh grade homework…probably. And yes—obviously this guy was going to be on his best behavior—he was there to molest children, not pick fights on the playground! He got busted when the school finally discovered that he forged his birth certificate. (I guess this guy must have been REALLY good in art class—I wonder if he offered to make all the kids a fake I.D. as a way of making friends?)
There’s more to this story, but mostly it’s really sick. But instead of dwelling on the negative, let me instead offer a public service to all those in the education system here in America so this doesn’t happen again.
You know that southern comedian Jeff Foxworthy who had that routine, “You Might Be a Redneck…?” Well, here’s my version called, “Your New Student Might Be Too Old For The Seventh Grade…” Here we go:
If he asks where he can park his car, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he’s absent for a week because he couldn’t get out of jury duty, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he’s in the school cafeteria and he asks to see the wine list, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he asks whether you use a blade or an electric, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he remembers Michael Jackson from the Jackson Five, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade. (and if he sees Michael Jackson as a role model, that might be a “red flag” too)
If for “show and tell” he rolls up his sleeve to give the class a better look at his tattoo, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he talks about movies and music from the late 1980s…almost like he was there, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he asks to go see the school nurse so he can have his prostate checked, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If most of the kids are taking Flintstone vitamins and he’s taking Viagra, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he was late for school because he had to vote, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he remembers Nancy Pelosi before all the plastic surgery, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If the teacher makes a “Where’s The Beef?” reference and he’s the only one who laughs, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If the kids are talking about Britney Spears and he says, “she’s no Joey Heatherton,” your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he remembers Madonna when she was sexy, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
If he refers to a movie as a “talkie,” your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
On Veteran’s Day, if he and the guest speaker trade war stories…literally, your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
And finally…
If someone brings in cupcakes for their birthday and he doesn’t eat one because “he’s on Atkins,” your new student might be too old for the seventh grade.
I hope this helps—while I may not have a degree in education…I am a thinker. I guess in Arizona, they have that reversed.-glenn
Posted in Glenn | 32 Comments »
State of the Union — My ADD Thoughts
January 24th, 2007
Balance the Federal Budget . . . Hmmm. Right. Without raising taxes. Not everyone stood followed by spending and NO ONE EVEN CLAPPED.
Such a game . . .
Hillary looks happy . . .Earmarks . . . 13,000 earmarks in one year? Wow. Cut earmarks. VERY GOOD THING. Must be passed by congress. NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. It is how they get re-elected.
Failing in SSI . . . Yep. Long term people like J. Lieberman. You know this is a game. How do you even act interested?
Schools . . . How is it we don’t understand and give local control to parents.
Heathcare . . . Democrats stand first. They must like sick people more than Republicans.
Can we get the two old farts from the muppets in the balcony behind Bush instead of Cheney and Pelosi? More fun to watch.
Health care . . . changing the tax code
Really how about getting rid of the tax code?How do you become a Democrat and really believe that government does things better than private sector? Where is A N Y evidence? Where has it E V E R worked?Did it **** anyone else off that when he talked about the border pelosi was nodding her head? NEITHER ONE OF THESE GUYS HAVE DONE ANYTHING ABOUT THIS ISSUE.
Is there more clapping this year?
Resolve status of illegal immigrants with out AMNESTY OR ANIMOSITY? What does that mean?Clean safe nuclear power. Uh …. tell that to Nancy. I would have love to have seen him turn around and look at her when he said this.
It’s been 10 minutes and I am really ready to watch Wheel of Fortune reruns where it ends in a money tie and all the puzzles are the same and they spell out CAT IN HAT.
75% import cut. Hmmm.
Double capacity of oil supplies! WOW. How long has it taken us to get it where it is? This is because we no long have the navy yards due to Clinton I’ll bet. This is about the military and what is coming. THIS IS THE LINE THAT JUMPED OUT TO ME.
What we do know on terror. GREAT STUFF.
Blow up planes over the ocean. BULL CRAP. Why would they do that. Here is an example of our government trying to make us feel safe. We don’t want to think of planes falling out of the sky over our cities.
Funding terror groups like Hezbollah. What is the Bush doctrine?
What did congress say after 9-11
He just spelled out a country that we must destroy based on our own pledge all in one sentence.Hillary I believe was one of the only democrat up after ‘we must’ stand for free people.
Why is what is happening in Lebanon right now being covered? It is Muslim on Muslim killing. It proves that it is not about us or Israel it is about power.
No Democratic clapping on NOT ABANDONING FRIENDS OR STRENGTHEN OUR RESOLVE TO VICTORY.
How are people keeping a straight face against more troops when they lectured us about following the Baker report? How come we don’t HEAR A N Y T H I N G about this now? I thought it was SOOO important.
Best description of what will happen if we lose in Iraq. THANK YOU! Pelosi was pissed at the 9-11 comment at the end of the Iraq part. Her wheels are turning This will not go unmentioned.
Pelosi is not for expanding the military. Civilian corps? Is this new? Have we ever done this before?
Pelosi up first on Iran and no nukes.
Free BURMA. Is that the place that makes the beach dunes? How did that get in the speech. Darfur. Once again not explained.
Fight Aids in Africa? Didn’t we fund the largest largest Aids program ever? Now Malaria too? Also, do you really think a Democratic congress is going to cut off Aids funding?
The end of the speech is really the favor bucket. Dikembe Mutumbo. Great example. THIS IS WHAT THE PRIVATE SECTOR DOES. Did they get the shortest person in the world to sit next to him?
Baby Einstein Lady — Hot Judy as I like to call her. Don’t be subtle with the message. THIS IS THE ENGINE THAT DRIVES OUR COUNTRY.
Wesley the train guy. WOW. Cool. Pointing out Congress men and women like shout outs. I thought for a second he was going mouth — call me.
GREAT ENDING MESSAGE. Ths is due to the poll that says we are on the wrong track. GREAT ENDING. John Kerry ran out.
Democratic response. Not so much.
First half bs, second half great. It is who he is. He is a guy that believes in the war on terror. The rest is political.
Our cause in the world is just. Democrats don’t agree.
Posted in Glenn | 48 Comments »
Progress
January 16th, 2007
I’ve been thinking a lot lately…even last week when I was in Los Angeles (shhh…they frown upon that sort of thing out there), and it hit me. You know how some people wonder if, given all of our technological advancements and hi-tech gadgets, we’re really any happier today than we were 50 years ago?
I gave this idea some serious, serious thought…then I checked my e-mail from my cell phone…and decided: Yes—we’re WAY happier! Now look—you’ve heard me ramble on about the values of our grandparents (I may have even cried) and I still believe in that sentiment whole-heartedly. Past generations seemed to believe in more meaningful things and I wish we placed more value on character today than we seem to. But…there’s no reason why we can’t improve the quality of our character while I watch the new episode of “24” on my video iPod, now is there? Sure, there may have been a better work ethic in the post-war years…you could take a man at his word and trust in the fact that his handshake was stronger than any contract. But once all the hand-shaking and word-giving was over, wouldn’t it have been nice to turn on a Playstation 3 and spend a few hours with “Madden 2007?” And then slide over to the microwave oven and pop in some “Totino’s 3 Meat Pizza Rolls” or maybe send a text message to Subway and have them fix you up a nice Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki sub? I say, yes, yes, a thousand times yes—it would have been nice because it’s awesome today (and I should know—I did extensive Pizza Roll research before I wrote this).Cell phones make communication effortless and much more efficient (that is, except if I’m trying to avoid a call from my wife—then they’re a wasteful nuisance). And laptop computers—it wasn’t really that long ago that the first computer—Univac–was so big it took up a whole room…and you couldn’t even get eBay on it! Today we have a computer that fits in your hand and that allows us instead to fill a room with a 60” High-Def plasma flat-screen TV. All the better to watch a digitally-restored movie on my new Blu-Ray DVD player. If that isn’t progress, I don’t know what is.So here’s to more personal electronics and happiness in the future. Batteries not included…
glenn
Posted in Glenn | 44 Comments »
In & Out Burger Is a Delicious Place To Eat
January 10th, 2007
You know how my titles for these blog entries are usually funny or some bitingly clever play on words? Not this time. No, this time I’m giving it to you straight…right from the “gut” as it were! (Wow…even when I’m trying to be serious I manage to bring laughter into the world—how do I do it?) Now, I have to admit that while I had heard of In & Out Burger, I had never eaten there (especially now that I’m trying to stay thin so I can fit into a size 52-husky bathing suit this summer). But one of the guys I’m traveling with was insistent that we stop there (yes, it is John Bobey, my doughy writer who ate his way across the country during the Christmas tour). Mr. “I gained 15 pounds on tour but don’t say anything ‘cause it’s a secret” (oops—my bad!) was talking about In & Out Burger in the car on the way to the airport—and we were still in New York—so I knew we’d have to stop or never hear the end of his carnivorous mantra. So once we landed in L.A. we asked our driver to stop on the way to the hotel (you know how nothing settles a stomach fresh from a turbulent 5–hour flight like fast food) so we could get us some. We were going to hit the drive-thru, but there must have been 15 cars in line ahead of us. Normally, I would have been annoyed, but the fat guy inside of me (okay fine—and outside of me) figured that, with a line that long, the food must be good. So we went in. If you’ve never been in an In & Out Burger, you’re initially struck by how clean the place is–it’s like a hospital where you can get an endless prescription for milk shakes. Then you look at the menu—hamburgers, cheeseburgers, french fries, and drinks. That’s it. No fish, no “chicken” nuggets, no rib-like patties or breakfast entrees infused with syrup. Just a simple selection of good old-fashioned burgers and fries. I ordered a Double-Double (mmmmm …double meat and double cheese…and it’s fun to say “Double-Double”—try it!) with onions and an extra large Diet Coke that came in a cup big enough to give a baby a bath in (not that I would do that of course). A couple of the guys got fries (of course John Bobey did—after all, you can’t maintain a Homer Simpson-like appearance by cutting back on the carbs), and they smelled like little golden sticks of Heaven. And not only was the food amazing, but two people recognized me and said “hi” while we were waiting, so it’s obvious that In & Out Burger attracts an intelligent customer with excellent taste in both snacks and cable news. We took our burgers in the car, ate them in silence like Zen monks contemplating the meaning of life as it pertains to cheeseburgers, and headed to the hotel. After all, we had to rest up for dinner in a couple of hours (prime rib at Mastro’s Steak House). Apparently, when in L.A….”Beef—it’s what’s for lunch…and dinner!”
I’m having a great time. Remember—if the In & Out Burger was convenient to stop at on our way from the airport, I bet it’s the same on the way to the airport. Double-Double number two–come to daddy…
-glenn
Posted in Glenn | 58 Comments »
It’s Déjà vu All Over Again
January 3rd, 2007
You know that movie Groundhog Day where Bill Murray keeps living the same day over and over and over again? Well, I realized that this blog has been largely the same…subjecting you all to the same December 8th entry with seemingly no end in sight. Granted—my Blue Velvet Suit wrote some funny stuff and that “Harrisburrrg!” title is pure gold, but I firmly believe that you deserve an update. See, this blog thing is tricky—I guess the notion is that I have interesting stuff to say all the time…but those of you who tune in to the radio and TV shows know that is definitely not the case. On the other hand, I often have thoughts that I feel compelled to share…not just because I’m a gifted communicator with the ability to fuse entertainment with enlightenment ™, but because I care about…you. Obviously, you can see the conflict. Whatever–I am but a conduit for the genius that flows through me, so I suggest that neither one of us thinks too hard about it and we simply enjoy the quality time this blog provides.
For instance, I bet you’ve all been wondering over your Christmas holiday about my office, right? I thought so. I may have mentioned in the past that I have a bad back, so much so that it starts to flare up whenever I sit down for a long period of time. (And you thought hosting a radio show was easy…) As I’m sure you can imagine, sitting behind a desk before my big time TV show, taking a nap…I mean, doing all my important hosting stuff, can take its toll. That’s when I looked into a “standing desk.” It’s just like a regular “sitting desk,” but it’s higher…you know, so it’s at the right level when I’m “standing.” There is a “chair” that goes with the “standing desk,” but it’s more like a hi-tech modified ergonomic stool with a back on it. I think it looks like Captain Kirk’s chair on Star Trek. Actually, the similarities between me and Kirk are striking…like, I think if you look closely you’ll see that William Shatner and I wear strikingly similar toupees (more so in his T.J. Hooker years, but he didn’t sit in a special chair so that’s why I mentioned Star Trek).
Anyway, since I’m getting a new desk, I decided to have my whole office redone. They took out all the old stuff and painted the walls a lovely shade of deep violet—it’s much more conducive to sleepin…I mean, thinking. Then they installed three flat screen TVs. I guess the reasoning behind that was so I can keep tabs on a bunch of networks simultaneously and think about news-type stuff, but I find that if I watch the Cartoon Network, the Food Network, and the Home Shopping Network all at the same time, I gain a unique insight and know way more than enough to have a lucid understanding of current events. I believe my work speaks for itself…
So that’s what’s new with me. Post a comment and let me know how you’ve been, and be sure to sign up for our weekly newsletter. It’s free and fresh each and every week…usually.
glenn
Posted in Glenn | 47 Comments »
Harrisburrrr! Wow, It Sure Is Cold Here!
December 8th, 2006
Glenn suggested that title, and now I’m regretting having agreed to use it. It’s beneath a suit in my price point. Yes, it me again, Glenn’s Blue Velvet Suit, the dreamy outfit that’s making Glenn’s Christmas Tour not just tolerable, but a revelation in holiday entertainment. Imagine Elvis (and since we’re making a Glenn comparison here, yes—the fat Elvis) in 1977 without the white jump suit. That’s the transformation I’m able to achieve—taking a misshapen dolt who cries with the frequency of a newborn and making him into a vision in blue velvet. And if you see Glenn on tour, don’t think that you’re the first person to start crooning Bobby Vinton’s “Blue Velvet.” People have been coming up with that “original” idea since Denver. And speaking of Colorado, thanks to my innate ability to bring joy, the tour really hit its stride in the Mile High City.
Glenn had some family in town in Denver and he got a case of the stagefrights like it was his 2nd grade Christmas pageant. A lesser suit would have found it charming, but me? It was pathetic. Were it not for my unflappability, the audience would have been in tears as well—not welling up with holiday sentiment, but tears of laughter as goofus flubbed the script. Once again, the cut of my jib saved the day, and it was a Merry Christmas after all.
Then it was off to Omaha where we re-ordered the show a bit. Yes, it was my idea. After a good pressing (the woman had the hands of an angel—I think I fell in love), it all became very clear to me and the show is flowing better than ever. Glenn continues to test the fortitude of my waistband by eating everything but the teeny hand soaps in the hotel bathroom. I hear in Omaha he skipped the spoon and drank the chicken jalapeno soup at Wheatfield’s right out of the bowl…then tried to pass it off as the “height of fashion” to eat soup that way. I also heard that nobody bought it—bravo Nebraska.
Now I sit crumpled in a booth of the Hilton’s “Raspberrie’s” restaurant in Harrisburg, PA. I mean me…crumpled. The bespectacled simpleton who Glenn hired to schlep me around the country has no class—he even spilled a little coffee on me (though I must say, it was delicious). He’s wearing mustard yellow sneakers and the same blazer I’ve seen for the last 3 days. If it weren’t for me, there would be no sartorial grace to this production whatsoever. Once again—Mr. And Mrs. America, you’re welcome.
Well, I’m off to the Forum, an art deco masterpiece featuring 8 different kinds of marble throughout the building, a stage paneled in Circassian walnut, and a breathtaking constellation-themed ceiling by Vincent Maragliotti. What, you’re not familiar with the decorative arts of the 1930s? You philistines—I may be just a simple but devastatingly beautiful blue velvet suit, but even I can appreciate the great architectural landmarks of the Keystone State. Get ye to Google!
I’m sorry—the coffee that my gangly handler spilled on me has obviously gotten me a bit keyed up. (Get it, “Keystone State…keyed up?” I got a million of ‘em!) I better sign off for now and relax—I don’t need the stress. It’ll be hard enough to wrap myself around big ol’ Beck. Let’s just say he likes to stay in hotels with 24 hour room service, but is he as adamant about an on-site workout facility? Hahahaha—oh that’s rich!
Get ready Pennsylvania—tonight, we get our velvet on!
–BVS
Posted in Glenn | 40 Comments »
He Wore Blue Velvet…
December 4th, 2006
For the rest of time that Glenn’s on his Christmas Tour, I’ll be updating his blog for him. See, I’m as close to him as you can get during this trip, and I’ll be able to give you all the gory details. Oh—I guess I should introduce myself—I’m Glenn’s velvet suit, the outfit responsible for making this tour a success. Mr. and Mrs. America, you’re welcome.
Glenn and I have been “collaborating” on this project since we met in New York just last week. Initially, I didn’t think it was going to work out—I mean, who would have believed that I would fit onto him (he’s sorta’ got the physique of a less fit Oprah). He says he’s been on the Atkins diet, but he must be referring to some other member of the family and not the famous weight loss guy. Perhaps there’s a Wally Atkins who thinks that approaching every meal as though it were some sort of eating contest is a good idea? But what do I know, I’m just a beautifully tailored suit in sumptuous blue velvet. I’m single-breasted (just like Glenn—don’t say anything—he’d kill me if he knew I told you) and exquisitely detailed (just like Gle…oh, who am I kidding—there’s no way you’ll buy that). Needless to say, when people get up on their feet to give Glenn a standing ovation, it won’t just be out of pity this time, but more so that they can get a better look at me. Yes, I’m worth it.
So, things are off to a great start. We left New York under less than ideal weather conditions (even I was queasy, I don’t have a stomach…just a lining of decadent Italian silk). I guess I should also mention that on this whole tour we’re traveling by private jet. Now, before you start to think that Glenn is sitting in the lap of luxury, let me burst your bubble. If I was dressing a bigger star (not literally—I’m not sure there is a bigger star…at least not one that isn’t currently on “The Biggest Loser”), the chartered jet would be sweet. But this is Beck, and this plane isn’t exactly state of the art. I believe it had been used in the past by the Peace Corps or some third-world cargo outfit, as the whole place smells like the pungent combination of sour milk and ethnic food…mostly chicken. And I don’t mean “cooked” chicken…but real, live chickens. There’s a funky livestock vibe about the whole plane, and I’m not at all happy (I found a feather in my pocket). Suffice it to say that you could be on a converted school bus traveling between Tijuana and Juarez, Mexico and be in more comfort and style than Glenn. Now, about the tour…
I look fantastic under the light show that accompanies Glenn’s ramblings. There’s just enough sheen to my fabric to really catch the light—it’s spectacular. People seem to be really responding to my plain front trousers—it’s a very contemporary look. The Salt Lake shows were both sold out (apparently, word of my arrival had been leaked to the press) and really tiring, but afterward I took a nice steam and crawled right back into my garment bag. Next thing I knew, I was in Denver. Don’t worry—I’ll hold up just fine with the altitude. Glenn? I’m not so sure. Let’s just say he gets winded from blinking, so being a mile high ain’t necessarily making his gut any easier to tote around. But once I’m on him and sporting my pocket square of dandy pink silk, all eyes are on me anyway.
I hope you can make it out to see me—after 12 shows in 2 weeks with limited dry cleaning opportunities, I’m not sure I’ll be around for future tours. I hear there are a few tickets left in some cities, so snap ‘em up while you can. And don’t worry if the seats are far from the stage—I’m the kind of suit that really plays to the back row.
Talk to you soon,
BVS
Posted in Glenn | 44 Comments »
7 Days Makes One Weak…
November 21st, 2006
Last week was easily the hardest for me since I started doing the television show. I’m just now coming down from the intensity of it all–it was quite a ride. For starters, my special on Islamic Extremism got on the air—forget for a moment how it did in the ratings, and let’s focus on that fact for a second. The show got on the air, and I can’t tell you how proud I am of that single accomplishment alone. Maybe some of you think that you just put a good show together, get someone to tape it, and then it just sort of ends up on TV—I know that’s how I used to think about it. I mean, we all know it’s more technically complicated than that, but basically I figured you just picked a compelling topic, asked interesting people interesting questions about that topic, and it ended up being compelling television. For good and for bad, nothing could be further from the truth.
The reality is that with a company as big as CNN Headline News (which is part of an ever bigger company called Time Warner), there are all sorts of rules, regulations, processes and procedures that come along with producing television—a system that I found often discouraging and always challenging. But you know what—I’m glad that I braved the storm. Our special presented information and a point of view that you don’t see on television, and I feel incredibly passionate about each and every word, especially since I was held accountable for each and every word. Even though I had complete confidence in the integrity of the material, I was forced to make sure every story and quote and translation held up to scrutiny, and they did. If you watched the special, what you saw was the cold hard truth as best I could present it. If you didn’t see it, keep an eye out, as we’ll be running it again. My entire staff—radio, TV and otherwise—went to the mat with me on this project, and the fact that it got on the air is an example of how much I and they sincerely care about what we do. I’m proud of us all.
As for the ratings? They rocked! It set a new record for our program and devastated our competition. That’s just the icing on the cake…
As for the other big news from last week, Jon Stewart and The Daily Show took their first shot at us, so I guess that means I’ve arrived. I won’t bore you all with the details, but they saw my interview with Muslim-American Representative-elect Keith Ellison, had a different point of view, and made one heck of a joke. If I had to get skewered, I’m glad it was by the best.
So as you can see, going to work last week was actually like…work. With Thanksgiving right around the corner, I better go lie down so I have enough energy to eat myself into a food coma. I’d hate run out of steam before I make it to the pies…
Happy Thanksgiving everybody—have a wonderful and safe holiday (and save me a drumstick).
-glenn
Posted in Glenn | 197 Comments »
The Show Must Go On . . .
November 13th, 2006
I am amazing.
Now, I’d hate for you to think that this is me getting carried away with myself…even though I do have a very healthy ego. No, the reason that I’m stating so emphatically that I’m so tremendous is this–last time I wrote to you all, it was in support of the wildly satisfying television show “Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.” As I’ve said before, I’m a huge fan of the stellar acting and writing, as well as the refreshingly “normal” portrayal of the female Christian character. There have been rumors of the show’s cancellation, and I asked all of you to give the show a chance. Well, in case you haven’t heard the news, NBC has ordered additional episodes of “Studio 60” so it looks like it’ll be around for a while longer.
I’m not saying that I saved the show, but I’m not not saying it either. Mr. Sorkin, you’re welcome.
And while we’re talking about Studio 60, there was a moment in an early episode when Matthew Perry’s character yelled at the show’s writers for not dressing like adults, and this week I almost did the same thing. Yes, I know that not everyone shares my often daring forays into fashion, but there are a few of the writers on my TV show who often sport the whole “blazer and ironic t-shirt” pairing. I mean, I understand and support Urban Outfitters’ right to sell t-shirts that say, “Gettin’ Lucky In Kentucky,” but I don’t support a grown man’s decision to wear it. I’m just sayin…
The Christmas tour is right around the corner, so I need to go make my “to do” list and check it twice. Rest assured, I’ll be sure to include “Tivo Studio 60” and “Bring Pink Shirts” on it. Now stop reading this and go buy some tickets—you don’t want to Christmis it!
-glenn
Posted in Glenn | 183 Comments »
Gone Too Soon . . .
November 6th, 2006
Every year without fail–it happens. I get too close too soon and then…they’re gone. No, I’m not talking about special Halloween decorated donuts at Krispy Kreme. Well…actually, I could be, but I’m not just not right now (I mean, why is orange-colored chocolate frosting so much more delicious than the regular cocoa brown-colored? What a delicious mystery…). What I am referring to are the new TV shows that premiere in September and then get cancelled. I tell myself to take it slow, get to really know them before I give myself over to that magical feeling—the butterflies in the stomach over a new infatuation. But I never listen.
I’d get in to what I went through over Cagney & Lacey…those daring, sassy vixens wrestling with love, family and being tough-as-nails police women…but the scars haven’t really healed yet. Sure there were the syndicated reruns, but it was never really the same. And every season since, I end up in this same mess with a different show—Designing Women, Growing Pains…Riptide. I can’t stop missing the laughs or the “very special” episodes—what was and what might have been.
This year, my heart belongs to Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip—it’s not officially gone yet, but it don’t look good. Now that I’m a big time TV star and a mover and shaker in the “biz,” I totally get all of the insider TV references, but that’s not even why I like it so much. As you’ve probably heard me say on my 3rd most listened to talk show in America, Studio 60 is smartly written and incredibly well acted. Plus, it’s the one show in a very, very long time that has presented a Christian character that’s three-dimensional. She’s bright, funny, charming and a real person, not some bible thumping cartoon character. In my opinion—especially considering that the vast majority of Americans hold their faith as a dear and vital part of their daily lives—it’s an appropriate reflection of the culture to present a character like that on mainstream TV. But even putting that aside…
The show’s just freakin’ awesome. Sadly, we don’t exactly have an excess of quality programming on network television (CNN Headline news?—now that’s a different story). Yes, there are good shows on the networks, but as long as there is a breath in my body and Two and a Half Men is on the air, I will always feel that there is room for more. So tonight, when you’re thinking about what to watch, you could do a whole lot worse that tune in and try on Studio 60. I’m not on some personal crusade here or suggesting that we all “save” the show, but I’m merely saying that it’s worth a look if you haven’t already. If you have, then know that while you’re watching and laughing and loving right along with those crazy kids trying to put on a show, I’m watching too. Take a moment and think of me, because somewhere I’m thinking of me, too.
-glenn
Posted in Glenn | 223 Comments »
« Previous Entries
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Beck Blog is powered by WordPress
02-06-2007, 10:47 AM
#4
1.0 BAR
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 610
Re: Glenn Beck........love this guy....
Originally Posted by Stealthmode
I find it easier to listen to on the radio.
:P
I hate it when someone asks me if I've seen _______ show on cable. 
02-07-2007, 01:00 AM
#8
3.0 BAR
Join Date: Feb 2004
Posts: 7,785
Re: Glenn Beck........love this guy....
Niggle that ---- was too much to read. Feel like I should have to write a paper afterwards it was so long. 
Shorten that ---- down, cause I ain't in school no more fool. Pictures are cool too. Me likely pics.
Shorten that ---- down, cause I ain't in school no more fool. Pictures are cool too. Me likely pics.
02-07-2007, 01:34 AM
#9
1.0 BAR
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 336
Re: Glenn Beck........love this guy....
Yea im not reading all of that. I used to listen to his show every morning at work he does make some good points and has some intersting view's on some subjects. But his outlook on some things just make him seem plain ingnort.
