Some valid questions I need answers to...
10-27-2003, 07:09 PM
#1
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 21,479
Some valid questions I need answers to...
1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."
3. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
4. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
5. Why do you drive on a parkway...But park in a driveway?
6. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
7. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
8. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
9. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? ! They're both dogs!
10. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
11. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
12. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
13. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
14. Stop singing and read on..........
15. Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
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2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."
3. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
4. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
5. Why do you drive on a parkway...But park in a driveway?
6. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
7. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
8. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
9. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? ! They're both dogs!
10. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
11. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
12. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
13. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
14. Stop singing and read on..........
15. Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
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10-27-2003, 08:11 PM
#2
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Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 242
Re:Some valid questions I need answers to...
Originally Posted by Dr.Boost
5. Why do you drive on a parkway...But park in a driveway?
13. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
14. Stop singing and read on..........
14. Stop singing and read on..........
17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
HAHAHAHAA nice doc! that ---- cracked me up. I wish i could answer those questions tho. I'm gonna go make some toast now mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm toast.
-Kaelon
10-27-2003, 08:15 PM
#3
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Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 6,857
Re:Some valid questions I need answers to...
1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
answer-Not the guy who saw a bull and thought the same thing.
2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."
answer-The guy whoe fucked it and saw the egg roll out afterwards
.
3. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
answer-couse British people arent humans
4. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
answer-Get a new light for it couse mine has one
5. Why do you drive on a parkway...But park in a driveway?
answer-*shrugs sholders....scratches noggen*
6. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
answer-Yes.The signs say 2 or more not 2 live ones or more
7. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
answer-I usually do the pee pee dance while I ask
8. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
answer-I disrobe on front of MY o.b.g.y.n....no waight!
9. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? ! They're both dogs!
answer-Pluto is Neanderthall and goofy is Cromagnan.
10. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
answer-For the same reason you are building or have built an HMT instead of buying a Greddy kit.
11. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
answer-********?
12. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
answer-he only has power of atterny.He doesnt own it.
13. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
answer-They dont.The alphabet song is about 1 second slower and the lmnop shurly set them apart.
14. Stop singing and read on..........
answer-oh yeah sorry...
15. Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
answer-asteroid has 1 s and hemo comes from the latin wor meaning "bleeding rotting -------"
16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
answer-my dog just died......(snif,snif)....get a mint Doc!
17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
answer-NO.GOD THATS ANNOYS ME!...and neither does the walk sings so dont push the ------- button more than once!
answer-Not the guy who saw a bull and thought the same thing.
2. Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."
answer-The guy whoe fucked it and saw the egg roll out afterwards
. 3. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
answer-couse British people arent humans
4. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
answer-Get a new light for it couse mine has one
5. Why do you drive on a parkway...But park in a driveway?
answer-*shrugs sholders....scratches noggen*
6. Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
answer-Yes.The signs say 2 or more not 2 live ones or more
7. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
answer-I usually do the pee pee dance while I ask
8. Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?
answer-I disrobe on front of MY o.b.g.y.n....no waight!
9. Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? ! They're both dogs!
answer-Pluto is Neanderthall and goofy is Cromagnan.
10. If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
answer-For the same reason you are building or have built an HMT instead of buying a Greddy kit.
11. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
answer-********?
12. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
answer-he only has power of atterny.He doesnt own it.
13. Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
answer-They dont.The alphabet song is about 1 second slower and the lmnop shurly set them apart.
14. Stop singing and read on..........
answer-oh yeah sorry...
15. Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
answer-asteroid has 1 s and hemo comes from the latin wor meaning "bleeding rotting -------"
16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
answer-my dog just died......(snif,snif
)....get a mint Doc! 17. Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
answer-NO.GOD THATS ANNOYS ME!...and neither does the walk sings so dont push the ------- button more than once!
10-27-2003, 08:41 PM
#4
3.0 BAR
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 21,479
Re:Some valid questions I need answers to...
Hahaha, that ---- had me cracking up as much as the questions did!
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10-27-2003, 08:49 PM
#6
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 21,479
Re:Some valid questions I need answers to...
Bah, you rich bastards and your dual lighted refrigerators. 
My fridge doesn't even have a light.
Yes, this is my fridge and yes I like Sprite. :P
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My fridge doesn't even have a light.Yes, this is my fridge and yes I like Sprite. :P
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10-27-2003, 10:27 PM
#9
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 0
Re:Some valid questions I need answers to...
18. Why are there road signs that say "LOOSE GRAVEL"? If it wasn't loose, would it still be gravel?
19. Why is there brail on all drive up atm's?
20. Why do people have hot water heater's? Does hot water really need to be heated?
21. How can they make the airplanes "black box" indestructable, but they can't make the plane out of the same material?
19. Why is there brail on all drive up atm's?
20. Why do people have hot water heater's? Does hot water really need to be heated?
21. How can they make the airplanes "black box" indestructable, but they can't make the plane out of the same material?
