Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

Well before i go on and talk about ---- you might not care about let me tell you that i am in a really hard place right not.
I feel like my world is falling down on me and i cant do anything aboutit.

So here goes. the wife and i got into it again for the 3rd time since we have lived in gardena, well not the 3rd but the police were involved. So it all boils down to us having totally different personalities and both of us not wanting to comprimise and meet half way. Me, im stubborn as a ..well i'm stubborn. She too is very headstrong and i hate it. So i have come to the conclusion that living together isnt gonna work. mainly because we both are very differnt and the only reason i was still their was to make the whole "family " thing work. You see its very important to my family that you work ---- out even if you are miserable and have 20 kids. Me, i dont thikn i could lie to myself for that long. sure i would love for things to work between Maria and I, but the truth is it's not gonna happen. So i guess plan for marriage at this point are non existant and plans to have a happy family have been raped from me because of someones power trip to call the cops and have me arrested.
I can't live my life in fear like this anymore, its not healthy and i hate it, having to look like a ----- when you go to the station and try to explain to MR PIg officer that your woman is PSYCHO!
I didnt really wan't this but at the same time i don't think i would be happy knowing that at any given time i could go to jail cause of her mood.
California's laws againts domestic violence are set up to ---- over the guy and not the girl. I have gone 2 jail 2 times because of her and have been lucky the past 3 times the cops have had to come and see what the problem was.

All i can do now is move forward and hope that the both of us can be adults and work this out seperatley for the sake of My son Mathias.....---- i miss the little guy already... :'(

for those of you not having any kids involved in situations like this i dont expect you to see things my way but still now that it isnt easy....

thanks for listening....

Julio Bustamante

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

I don't know what to say man but hopefully things will be get better when you move out and have some time apart. Who know somethings might be for the better. It's gonna be hard for the little guy to be stuck in the middle of this though.

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

---- julio, I feel for you man. You know I'll try to help you as much as I can, you know our arrangement. Hopefully things can work out between the two of you, but if not, just keep your head up man. :)

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

Damn man, between the tickets and ----. Life is shitty now, but thigns will turn around. Only way things get better though is through hard work. No other way to it. Good luck with it man.

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

possibly the best advise ever.

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

That is the only way things work out. If ---- is going wrong you gotta make up for it by just working harder.

I am not saying that you are, but you can't just say "life is shitting on me", and then sit there and let it happen

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

Julio, don't worry about mathias, he'll be ok. You love him more then I've ever seen a dad love his son. if he has nothing else in the world he'll still be the richest kid I know.

I personally don't think it is healthy for you or for him for you and maria to still be together.

If there is anything I can do I'm there for you man.

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

Relationships can be hard work sometimes.
Anyone who thinks that being in a relationship is easy street is in for a big shock, cause there's always something coming down the road to test the both of you...

LOTS of fights I seen come down to basic mis-understanding of whats expected by one another... so say everything u gotta say, & then hear *everything* she's gotta say... and then and ONLY then are u in the best position to know what to do next...

boosty....hang in there dude cause I know u know that these things have a funny way in working out in the end....

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

Damn Julio I just talked to you the other day and was telling you to do the marriage thing. Oh man I feel horrible now and completely forgot about cali and the 3 strikes law. I'd say run for the hills cause it's a little to see your son behind some bars and post on HMT :P. Had to make you laugh alittle. I just think if she's done it twice before what's gonna stop her from doing it again? Well I hope that you things work out or that maybe things don't work between the two of you but are intelligent adults and can work something out with little Boostamante about visitation. PM me and let me know if you chat about this. I've gone through this too! HMT sticks together like chit on your shoes!

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

damn, taht sucks man. i was kind of in the same boat, i love my wife and never wanted to leave her b/c of our daughter, but finally enough was enough, like you, every time we would get in a fight, she would threaten to call the cops on me and what not, it was ridiculous, finally, i just left one day, as much as it hurt to 'give up' on my family, i couldn't take it any more. after about a month of being seperated, she realized what a crazy ----- she had been to me all the time and got a reality check b/c she never thought i would leave her, i gave her another chance, mostly for my daughter, but things are a lot better now and we just might make it after all. if maria loves you enough, maybe the same thing will happen for you, if she's not willing to change even after you're gone b/c she realizes that she drove you away, then she doesn't love you as much as she should anyways, sometimes it just takes drastic measures for people to reevaluate a situation, hopefully things will work out for you in time so that you can be a family again :-\

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

i cant really relate to you but i do know alot about this from the kids perspective. my parents are divorced and have been for a while. the only thing i can really say is if its meant to be its meant to be. things like this happen for some reason that you will never figure out. good luck

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

Youve stayed in there longer than I would of Julio.Just get the ---- out.Life is too short to live like that.

I know its gonna be hard on you to not be with your kid everyday but thats just the way life is going to have to be if you wnat to enjoy it yourself.

---- that old school mexican menatlity your fam. has about staying with someone just for the kid or just to make THEM feel good.You got to do whats right for you and that is to ditch her and get on.

Plus your a little fella and you must not fair good in jail :P **chants**fresh fish,fresh fish**chants**

Good luck!

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

Thats rough. I can't imagine what it would be like to not be around for your child. I hate not being around for my brother since I moved out of my parents house. Good luck to you. You know HMT is always here for ya.


BTW, out of curiousity, I'm not familiar with the laws in Cali, but what can your wife call the cops on you for and get you in trouble. I'm assuming because of you language that she was calling the cops because you were verbally fighting. Why are they arresting you for that? or is she saying something else?

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

if you have a woman who will call the cops on you, you have a woman who needs to get the ---- out

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

I usually don't like to comment on things so personal but in your case I'am compelled to say a few words. Never lose hope and never give up on your family because the only thing that can't be fixed is death. The best advise I can give you is "Trust in God, he will never let you down".


Keep your head up things will get better.

:D

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

best advice. If you two don't work out then its might be best. Just as long as your there for your son and you love him thats all that matters really

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

hope things work out for you and your kids because i have a ---- that won't let me see mine :(

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

Julio..well me personally didn`t invoid TOO MUCH long term releationship like yours :P but
let me brings MINE family as an example.
ever since i knows how to talk, i`ve always heard my parents aguring in the middle of the night. over stupid stuff, mostly about how much they are NOT communicating to each other, my mom even said she sould have just leave if they got no childerens. i remember how Mom`d crying and dad just kept dead slient and let her talk. now after all these years, finally we moved in here and my Dad just stay in HK. (they did NOT devoice)
i didn`t want to ammit it but it is the BEST thing it could have even happen. i mean if two person is NOT meant to be, then why kept on lying to yourself, and staying together because of the kid? Do you know when it comes to the last moment, you guys finally decided to seperate, who gets hurt the most? the Children that is.
imgaine after 20 years or so, the boy grow up and wanted to move out. Now without the kid, do you STILL want to stay with her?.
i meant i don`t know exactly what is going on between two of you. like Kevin said you might still have a chance if BOTH of you finally decided to work it out. and DO NOT feel selfish if you really have to quit because you feel like you are not taking care of the kid. How could the kid be happy if two of you can not get alone.

edit, i don`t know WTF i just wrote but you`d get it.

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

its funn you say that..i actually understood you this time :P

but i know what you mean...i have been trying for the longest to get along with her and just deal with her but at the same time i dont really feel good about the whole situation. I kinda feel like i have no voice. like i'm getting stepped on. Maybe its just that i want to live a life different than what i have. Not saying i want to be single and ---- everything that moves, but just differnt with the 2 of us.

i stopped by today to talk to the manager about what was going on cause i stopped by the house to get some things. I saw maria and she wanted to know what was going on with me. ( mind you my son wastn home he was at day care ) but i really didnt fell like talking about it. I really need some time away from her.

D164life:

i know what you mean by not staing together for the kids cause our mexican families always tell us too. I mean i have many uncles and ---- that are together with the mother just to be wiuth the kids but at the same time hate their lives.
Its funny that they say" oH work it out for your son" and i know they mean well but things have changed and they come from a time where it was OK or accepted to beat their wives if they acted up.
Now a days you even thikn about that and your already behind bars wondering WTF happened?

I am with my son right now at my moms, i picked him up from day care and decided to spend some time with him. i know im on here writing this but i felt i needed to update you guys opn whats happening.

Irs no easy by any means, but i will be strong and try to keep my head up.
And thank you all for giving me your advice it's helping. ;D

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

Keep your chin up man.. and good luck ;)

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

has julios gf seen this?

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

i think maria could probably whoop your ass. ;)

Re:Shit hits the fan at the Boostamante Home
 

:P