problems at home need advice.
 

Well for those who dont know i am one of the younger active members here. I am having some bad problems at home. My dad lost his job because of this fuckclown guy named patrick who told the main boss my dad was ratially insulting a guy there, he got fired on the spot. [BS]

To add to the problems my stepmom is a ------- alchaholic and it bothers and embarasses me at the same time. It really puts alot of stress on me all the time. Ive talked to her about it but it doesnt help. The bad thing is that she isnt a bad person either =/

ALso the big thing is that job my dad had was a bling bling job , the employer actually tracked him down and hired him on spot. He got that job after working in a hell hole of a job on his own which he hurt his back badly, doing tile jobs on side to pay for my brothers college.

To sum it up, my dad is depresed to get a job, he just doesnt care, stepmom= drunl problem. I have one alternative and that is to move to Tampa, FL with my mom , but she would have to find a local job and i dont want her to quit her consulting job since she just got promoted to senior manager.

I dont know what i should do, id appretiate an honest word of advice form a neutral crowd. Thanks all very much!

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

how old are you?

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

15, 16 en noviembre.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

wow, we got something similar in commin. but my mom moved to the USA due to my dad's alcohol problem and temper, so now she is in Oklahoma or 15 min away taking her business degree or someshit.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

why would your mom need to quit her job?

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

where do you live cause you don't speel very well...Do you live in Quebec?

My suggestion to you is get a job...be at home as little as possible and go party on the weekends...just remember drugs and alcohol are always there for you.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

I've been there trust me. Moved out at 17 from all the bs. Well we are looking for a Service writer/consultant down here in Ft.Myers FL. Just a little bit further south. About the only advice I would give is just keep your head in the game. Keep up with school and set some goals. No matter how shitty things get at home eventualy, and soon, you will be out of there just don't let it effect your schooling. My mistake was that I did. I had 2 full ride scholarships that I couldnt attend because I simply sould not asfford to live. I went out of high school right into full time work. Just do your best with your scholastics hang in there. the family ---- always finds a way to work things out.

FYI my dad is now on his 4th wife, my mom her 3rd husband. I went to 8 different schools growing up from moving all over the damn place. BELIEVE me I know how stressfull it can be growing up in a divided family.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

lol i live in douglasville, ga i was typing louse because i was and still am pissed. glad to know there are people out there that delt with this ---- too. im talking to my mom about moving to tampa with her because i cant stand this bs here.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

Tell your dad to go after his previous boss. Racial discrimination is grounds for dismissal, but not without the proper evidence against him. Tell him to fight it, whats he got to lose?

Talk to your mom some more about her drinking problem. Tell her how much it bothers you, and how much it would mean to you for her to stop.

Also.. just hang in there kid.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

It's hard to know the whole situation by what you told us, but I'd just have to say to believe that things will get better. If you don't think things will get better, your setting yourself up for failure.
In your mom's case, (or any case of alcohol, drugs, bad habits, ect.) I'd say to talk to her and really lay out all of your feelings about what she's doing. If things don't change after that, than leave it up to her, but try to not let it effect you if possible. You can try and try again, but you can't help people that can't help themselves.
Your dad may be down for awhile, but if he can't get his job back, than he's just going to have to find another job with the skills that he has. He's also got to believe that things will get better.

Good luck. ;)

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

i don't think you should leave your dad, try and help him with his depression. he must have some type of skil if he was good at his previous job. how long has he been unemployed? if it happened yesterday then maybe he needs sometime to reflect and is stil in shock he got laid off.
i got laid off last year cause i went against the grain w/management plus a couple major brown nosers there. i'm doin my own thang now, but it took me a few weeks to get back grindin. take your dad to the park, or a high school football game! it'll make him happy when he sees you're trying to help him and give him a reason to try again. anything to snap him outta any depresion he might have. as for your step mom, it might bother you, but it might be outta your control to get her to stop drinking, you could always try though. AA works. get your dad outta the house as often as you can for any little reason so he snaps back to his old self. i wish you and your pops the best of luck and health.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

Drink all the alcohol so your step mom's got nothing left. Nah. Yeah it's hard for us to give you advice, just because we're not there to see the whole situation. I wouldn't leave your dad just yet if he's depressed. Talk with both of them. Be the man of the house, and put your foot down. If things don't change at all, move in with your mom. And yes, keep up with your school work. I wish I stayed in the game, and picked up a few scholorships. Good luck man, hang in there.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

word :'(

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

yeah..If your dad not stepping up to the plate to make things better be a man a let him know. Tell him how you feel just like you told us. It might get harder from here on it might not, but now is the time you have to learn whats best for you

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

Don't worry dude, someone else out there always has it worse. I hate my stepdad and I truly resent my mother for marrying the -------, so I'm not close to my mother as I used to be. I got some home problems too and I'm ------ 20. I put up with this ---- for 10 years, so don't worry, everything will work out ok. Just don't worry yourself too much. Go out with your dad to help him look for a job, you'd be spending quality time with him and helping him out at the same time. Kill 2 birds with like 4 tires... ??? Is that how the saying goes? Well, hope I made you feel better. HMT is always here for you buddy. ;)

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

you are an idiot, drugs and alcohol just add to the problems. obviously with a comment like that you are doing them and have NO brain cells left.

As for the problem its time to let your dad deside what he is going to do. get a job and start making a living. try to help the family and not run away from it, that tends to put alot of stres on everyone and really doesnt solve a whole lot. I would also get your mom to go to AA or something to get over her problem which is more than physical, it is all mental. and alot of people who drink too much think they have no problem they do. there is alot of people on this site like that, they think drinking a 12 pack after they get off work is ok and there is no problem and they refuse to see what is actually happening to there life. Perhapse after your dad get another job its time to move to your mom after she is done with her degree to get away for a bit and let your dad figure out what to do with your stepmom. To find out wht is bothering you step mom you could try to find some sort of pattern to figure out why she is drinking and figure out if you can help things. as much as you hate it and your current situ. family is the most important thing in life. With out family and friends there is NOTHING in this world for you. and no drug can hide that.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

After your stepmom gets done with a bottle just take it and crack it over her skull and tell her everytime she finishes one you get to small it over her head. Seriously. >:(

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

I think someone said something about finding something constructive outside of the house. I think that would be a good idea. find a girl who wants to spend alot of time, and go with that. find a job. find a jab which also goes along the lines of your hobbies. get a new hobby, which consumes alot of time.

-try to be a volonteer somewhere, like a big brother/big sister thing. I don't know. I would try to find something to do, outside of the house.

but the advice on getting your dad out, I think thats a good idea to. you can't just walk out on your dad because then he will think he failed you, and never be straight again. he never done anything wrong, so you cant walk out on him.

it might be a good idea for you to move with your mom, but i would have that as a last resort.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

he would fight it but one thing georgia is a live to work state. his boss could say ur ugly and then ur fired, tehres not ---- we can do. as far as the racial coment it was said in private out of work.

ive talked with all of them , i told my dad and stepmom i have everything ready to go to tampa, if you want me to stay stop all this bullshit. So we will see what happens, thanx for all the advice everyone. the sad thing is my dad is a very smart person with degrees in business. So he is no fool. Im trying to work it out with them tonight.

Thanks All for your advice!

]

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

I say move if your mom is fine with it. I grew up in a very similar style home left when I was 17 and trust me it was for the better. It's hard but focus on goals and put the negative energy you experinced into a postive and it will all work out.

Re:problems at home need advice.
 

GET A JOB, save some $$$, find an older friend that needs a roommate, and GET THE ---- OUT!!!

one thing you have to realize, you will not be able to help anyone, that won't help themselves.

good luck
mike