welcome back HMT to its finest

you can suck it after your mom gets off it, son.

TO THE OP: READ THIS ------- POST!!!

but first E-bola,


Some part of you had to know that for that man to type that ---- here that he's feeling like he's out of friends and out of options.

It's fun to ---- with people and its certainly your right to, but in doing so you've missed the rare chance of contributing something positive to a genuine problem that is actually significant in the grand scheme of things.

a little bit of ------- empathy,small, irrelevant and non helpful you may think it would be,
Could help a nog out more than you could ever know or appreciate unless you see it with your own eyes. and it wouldnt have costed a damn thing.
Anyways, my bad, to each his own, no hard feelings.


That being said,

TURBO DAVE,

Realize this NOW:

Its pretty safe to assume you've in some way fucked over everyone you know or cared about you in some way. If not by lying or stealing from them, then by making them go to the funeral they are going to have to attend in less than a year if you maintain a 300mg a day oc habbit + the boi.

When all else fails, hope is lost and you don't give a ---- about yourself, the least you can do with your its-not-to-late wasted life is not be a selfish ---- and die, leaving all of them behind with a guilt of feeling like they failed because they couldnt help you.

You owe them an honest effort. you owe yourself the effort but you don't currently feel as though you are worth or deserving of anything. when all else fails and you cant solve your own problems, go try to solve someone else's. IT WORKS EVERY TIME.


Do what you ALREADY KNOW you gotta do. Do whatever it takes to remove yourself from your environment. Rehab sucks. no ----, but not as bad as being out of ---- for 2 days, dope sick, unimaginable pain that will never end until either you kick it, or die.

sometimes you gotta let go of the wheel and let somebody else drive for a while.

PM me if you are interested in a few good ideas...im not talking fukin N-A, church, support groups and all the other ---- you already know about.

I'll tell you how it's done when rehab/medicine/family arn't an option.

Good luck and if you remember any of this let it be this:

when you get clean off the ----, for oh, at least 3 weeks, when you relapse, drop the CC's by 70% first time you spike and don't blow down more than a 40 of OC or else
YOU WILL O.D. and die.
this is not speculation,
this is concrete fact.


Your tolerance no matter how high drops 95% within the first 2-4 weeks.

peace