I hate him
01-19-2005, 03:30 PM
#33
3.0 BAR
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 8,155
Re:I hate him
i will protect my mother no matter what. I just dont want to fight my own father and become enraged and do something to him i might regret or have something done to me he might regret. I know i am my own man I just dont wont to go the route he did. It means alot to me to have a people to listen to what i have going on right now. This is a family. I have to go now im off work. I have to take care of this.
01-19-2005, 03:48 PM
#35
0.0 BAR
Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 0
Re:I hate him
Luckily Dragon, I don't know my father.. I heard he was somewhat like this. I've seen him once since I was 7... but I can tell you this. If he, my former step-dad, my "current" step-dad, whoever touches my mom I'd beat them down until I or they couldn't move; I know you're afraid of becoming your father.. but what needs to be done needs to be done 
I wish you the best of luck man. If you need to talk sometime hit me up on AIM.
I wish you the best of luck man. If you need to talk sometime hit me up on AIM.
01-19-2005, 04:24 PM
#36
1.0 BAR
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 302
Re:I hate him
Just get your stuff out while he's at work. (unless he has an unpredictable work schedule)
I wouldnt fight unless it is self defense (for you or your moms). Whatever you do, Don't START the fight. If you do, then your moms is right, dont stoop down to his level.
If it came down to it, get a restraining order.
What about his Reputation? If there's no other choice that'll save it, ---- it. Do what you gotta do to avoid violence.
Domestic violence: These things happen and chances are it happened to him. Just try your BEST not to turn out like that. What's interesting is, he probably said those same words about not turning to be like his father.
I wouldnt fight unless it is self defense (for you or your moms). Whatever you do, Don't START the fight. If you do, then your moms is right, dont stoop down to his level.
If it came down to it, get a restraining order.
What about his Reputation? If there's no other choice that'll save it, ---- it. Do what you gotta do to avoid violence.
Domestic violence: These things happen and chances are it happened to him. Just try your BEST not to turn out like that. What's interesting is, he probably said those same words about not turning to be like his father.
01-19-2005, 04:56 PM
#37
3.0 BAR
Join Date: Nov 2003
Posts: 1,687
Re:I hate him
Jason, I think you need to ask yourself...is someone who beats and tries to kill other people worth the respect you have for them? IMO, no. I know what you mean about respecting the man that is your father. But as a human, he does not deserve it.
Another thing to think about...calling him out on physical abuse/domestic violence may keep him from being an officer, but getting into another fight (with him no less) is what would be "bringing you down to his level." Protecting yourself and others from people who are dangerous by contacting authorities is normal. Fighting and using violence to solve a problem only brings you down to the same level as the person wanting to fight, and shows others that that's the only way you think the issue will get resolved. Doesn't sound very mature does it? And your father, is not a mature adult, if he feels he has to beat other people just to make his life seem not so shitty. And it's probably because he was raised in a physically abusive home too. But this is wrong and he needs to be called out on it...whether that means he has to go find another job or not.
Another thing to think about...calling him out on physical abuse/domestic violence may keep him from being an officer, but getting into another fight (with him no less) is what would be "bringing you down to his level." Protecting yourself and others from people who are dangerous by contacting authorities is normal. Fighting and using violence to solve a problem only brings you down to the same level as the person wanting to fight, and shows others that that's the only way you think the issue will get resolved. Doesn't sound very mature does it? And your father, is not a mature adult, if he feels he has to beat other people just to make his life seem not so shitty. And it's probably because he was raised in a physically abusive home too. But this is wrong and he needs to be called out on it...whether that means he has to go find another job or not.
01-19-2005, 08:37 PM
#40
0.0 BAR
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 0
Re:I hate him
I have a fuckstick for a dad too. Luckily, I don't have any contact with him. When I was younger and I would do something fucked up, my mom would say, "that's just like your dad". The worst thing I could ever do is be around him to pick up the bad influences I know are a part of myself too, but I choose not to express. Being around him would make it seem like those bad habits/character traits are more "normal" and therefore more acceptable to use.
It sounds like you (and your mom) would benefit from being out of that situation FOR GOOD. If all he is is a bad habit/influence/character/ect., than he isn't someone you (or anyone) should be around or learn anything from.
Time and time again he says he's going to change, but doesn't. It's just the way he is and he can't help it, but you can help your situation and your mothers. Leave.
If you don't want to have a confrontation with him, it's understandable, and you can control the situation with your communication. Express yourself in a subtle tone at all times, no matter what. Once your dad begins to scream/yell or whatever, as long as you keep that subtle tone, and express how you are feeling about how he's acting, there's a good chance that the situation won't get out of control.
Situations get out of control when someone starts talking loudly, the other person tries to be louder, both people are yelling, then it turns into a fight.
If you keep your subtle tone, there is no reason for him to continue raising the level of his voice. Maybe he'll realize that he is screaming at a guy talking to him in a normal tone.
If that doesn't work and the situation still gets out of control, just know that in the end people get what they deserve. You, your mom, and him, will all get exactly what you deserve. Keep your head up and look forward to that day.
It sounds like you (and your mom) would benefit from being out of that situation FOR GOOD. If all he is is a bad habit/influence/character/ect., than he isn't someone you (or anyone) should be around or learn anything from.
Time and time again he says he's going to change, but doesn't. It's just the way he is and he can't help it, but you can help your situation and your mothers. Leave.
If you don't want to have a confrontation with him, it's understandable, and you can control the situation with your communication. Express yourself in a subtle tone at all times, no matter what. Once your dad begins to scream/yell or whatever, as long as you keep that subtle tone, and express how you are feeling about how he's acting, there's a good chance that the situation won't get out of control.
Situations get out of control when someone starts talking loudly, the other person tries to be louder, both people are yelling, then it turns into a fight.
If you keep your subtle tone, there is no reason for him to continue raising the level of his voice. Maybe he'll realize that he is screaming at a guy talking to him in a normal tone.
If that doesn't work and the situation still gets out of control, just know that in the end people get what they deserve. You, your mom, and him, will all get exactly what you deserve. Keep your head up and look forward to that day.
