How to poop at work
. How've you been man
03-10-2008, 09:43 PM
#33
0.5 BAR
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 198
Re: How to poop at work
u gotta try the sani seat...especially if you work in a public place like me...this prevents *** diseases:
1. Spray w/disinfectant...wd-40 and lighter works well as substitute
2. wipe seat down exstensively with 4 ft of tp
3. pull 4 more ft of tp and divide into 6" lengths
4. make a 4" layer of tp (from *** to seat) to prevent any surviving bugs/jumpers from burrowing into chode/gooch
5. poop at will
*** disease free for 1 year at this towing company with some dirty mf's (knock on wood)
1. Spray w/disinfectant...wd-40 and lighter works well as substitute
2. wipe seat down exstensively with 4 ft of tp
3. pull 4 more ft of tp and divide into 6" lengths
4. make a 4" layer of tp (from *** to seat) to prevent any surviving bugs/jumpers from burrowing into chode/gooch
5. poop at will
*** disease free for 1 year at this towing company with some dirty mf's (knock on wood)
03-12-2008, 11:33 AM
#36
3.0 BAR
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 1,967
Re: How to poop at work
Since it's resurrected I'll add to the list of stories:
So I was mowing grass with the guy I work for (we were both mowing with 2 tractors) in the summer on the John Deere 4610. All of the sudden, I have to ----, BIG TIME. where am I mowing anyway? oh probably the farthest spot away from the house, like 5-600 yards. So I shut the tractor off, get off and run the gaunlet, ***** out across the field to the house trying to hold the overwhelming urge to ----. Doesn't sound like much but you try and do it. I make it in the door, and doesn't a prairie dog slip out. I'm like ----! I ---- myself!
So I get in the bathroom, and DESTROY the toilet. I mean I fucked it up. Of course it was one of those weak ----- toilets that don't flush worth a ----. and after I'm done wiping the huge mess and using half a roll of TP, the thick ---- of course, The toilet is plugged BIG TIME. I don't know where his wife was the whole time but I'm glad she wasn't around. Then while I'm plunging the toilet trying to force the monstrosity down the drain, I hear the owner out side calling my name. I look at the seat, which was one of the cushioned ones, and I got some ---- on it. So I clean up the toilet and I ENDED UP STAINING THE SEAT CUSHION. I tried comet, everything that was under the sink and I left a mark on the toilet. Eventually I had to do the walk of shame, knowing I just WRECKED his bathroom (luckily not his main one, this guys house is huge).
Probably the most embarrassing day of my life thus far.
Cliff notes: Mowing grass, had to ----, ran across field, sharted, WRECKED bathroom, walk of shame.
So I was mowing grass with the guy I work for (we were both mowing with 2 tractors) in the summer on the John Deere 4610. All of the sudden, I have to ----, BIG TIME. where am I mowing anyway? oh probably the farthest spot away from the house, like 5-600 yards. So I shut the tractor off, get off and run the gaunlet, ***** out across the field to the house trying to hold the overwhelming urge to ----. Doesn't sound like much but you try and do it. I make it in the door, and doesn't a prairie dog slip out. I'm like ----! I ---- myself!
So I get in the bathroom, and DESTROY the toilet. I mean I fucked it up. Of course it was one of those weak ----- toilets that don't flush worth a ----. and after I'm done wiping the huge mess and using half a roll of TP, the thick ---- of course, The toilet is plugged BIG TIME. I don't know where his wife was the whole time but I'm glad she wasn't around. Then while I'm plunging the toilet trying to force the monstrosity down the drain, I hear the owner out side calling my name. I look at the seat, which was one of the cushioned ones, and I got some ---- on it. So I clean up the toilet and I ENDED UP STAINING THE SEAT CUSHION. I tried comet, everything that was under the sink and I left a mark on the toilet. Eventually I had to do the walk of shame, knowing I just WRECKED his bathroom (luckily not his main one, this guys house is huge).
Probably the most embarrassing day of my life thus far.
Cliff notes: Mowing grass, had to ----, ran across field, sharted, WRECKED bathroom, walk of shame.
03-12-2008, 04:29 PM
#37
1.5 BAR
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 863
Re: How to poop at work
pretty good laugh. well, im on the opposite end of this scale, i dont care. ill usually take a crap as soon as i clock in or right after i take my break. i intentionally ---- when im on the clock so i get paid for it. not only that, i use my managers bathroom so she gets the linger of my aroma....the fan is rarely turned on.
i dont know, it used to bother me shitting at work, but i just got over it.
i dont know, it used to bother me shitting at work, but i just got over it.
03-13-2008, 04:20 AM
#38
!! UNCONFIRMED EMAIL !!
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,305
Re: How to poop at work
not me but pretty funny
well i am a driver for a delivery/courier company and one night i was working i stopped at this gas station (quik trip) and i went in and took a **** and right as i walk into the bathroom i was overcome with that smell of arid feces. i walk over the the ******* and there was ------- ---- everywhere, almost like they did some tub girl ---- in there. i mean there had to be like 3 people dropping monster loafs and then ------ing it on the walls/floor, and the toilet was just ------- full of liquid ---- just pouring over the sides.
i actually had to stop and look at it for a min becuase it must have took some work to pull that stunt off. i go out and buy a gatorade and im talking to the girl at the counter and i was like "do you know what happened in the mens bathroom?'' she said no, whats wrong. i told her it would be in here best interest to ignore it until the next shift. so walks back there and opens the door and screams. that was the worst mess i have ever seen.
told my boss and he said his wife is a counselor at a school and said playing with your ---- is a sign of sexual abuse.
well i am a driver for a delivery/courier company and one night i was working i stopped at this gas station (quik trip) and i went in and took a **** and right as i walk into the bathroom i was overcome with that smell of arid feces. i walk over the the ******* and there was ------- ---- everywhere, almost like they did some tub girl ---- in there. i mean there had to be like 3 people dropping monster loafs and then ------ing it on the walls/floor, and the toilet was just ------- full of liquid ---- just pouring over the sides.
i actually had to stop and look at it for a min becuase it must have took some work to pull that stunt off. i go out and buy a gatorade and im talking to the girl at the counter and i was like "do you know what happened in the mens bathroom?'' she said no, whats wrong. i told her it would be in here best interest to ignore it until the next shift. so walks back there and opens the door and screams. that was the worst mess i have ever seen.
told my boss and he said his wife is a counselor at a school and said playing with your ---- is a sign of sexual abuse.
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